Chance Abandoment of Acquiescence (631 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.29 on 38 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by S.I. Co. Semen (View user info) at 2007-05-11 09:10:10 EDT
Just when he was starting to get sleepy a sudden rush of warmth slithered throughout his body sending cold shakily throughout his veins, creating a duality of feelings. Vincienzo pulled himself out of bed, shaking the dust from his hair, the webs from his arms, and the fog from his eyes and ran with ease to the bathroom producing the most gut wrenching, pit spinning vomit he's ever known.
Vincienzo spewed his egg salad sandwich from 3 hours earlier along with water that had turned foamy with the massive amount of churning occuring inside of him. It was all short lived lasting 10 seconds at the most, rendering him useless for hours he thought. When he lifted himself off the floor it was as if his bones were hollow and full of helium; he felt as though he could do any enduring physical task without any reprocussion. He climbed back in bed.
He got out of bed and went upstairs which was in stark contrast to his basement bedroom, which was dark, dim, and didn't emit a good vibe at that point. Here Vincienzo sat around his square coffee table admiring the glass triangular cutouts on each corner that shown through to the bottom part of the table underneath.
Duality he thought.
He managed to crawl in between the tiers of the coffee table and watched the television, however, Vincienzo wasn't so much watching the program as looking at the television itself. He couldn't help himself. He broke out into the most uproarious, cantakerous, evil, and happy laughter all at once, almost convincing himself that he was maniacal.
After an hour or so he began to feel uncomfortable and Vincienzo squeezed himself out from the oak board sandwich that he cleverly placed himself in. On the burnt sienna orange couches he twisted and turned, flipped himself upside down, inside out, downside up, outside in, rightside left, lefside right, trying to reach the maximum level of comfort only falling just shy every time. His skin itched but it was emanating from the inside and he was just sure that it was an itch after all.
About two hours after his vomiting the lights started coming and that is when he noticed that someone had painted his walls pink while he was fidgeting on the couch. It was a pleasant pink and he didn't correlate the pink with that of a gay admonition people associate it with. Instead he welcomed it by opening the door to back yard.
Vincienzo stood on the deck admiring the sunset when a certain knot of wood caught his eye and he couldn't help but be entranced with it's craftsmanship, or craftswomanship should he say. After all, it was mother nature who provided him with this delicate, beautiful, serene piece of wood that he walked over hundreds of times but never bothering to pay attention. He descended down the steps and the grass was amazing.
Never had he seen such vivid yellow grass in his times but he was absolutely bespectacled at the way the grass rubbed his naked feet. Just 4 hours after he had made the biggest purge of his life, Vincienzo was awed by the greatest grass he's ever walked in. Each reed of grass that broke off into the blades were perfectly trimmed by the precise lawnmower which had created the most spectacular lawn he's ever walked in. He noticed the friendly caterpillars everywhere, the ones that had green bodies, with brown flecks, and millions of red papillae-like hairs waving in no particular order. A few minutes later, he supposed, they had gone to their tiny little houses because they were no longer there.
He bent over, touched the grass, stroked the grass, appreciated the grass until he got the eerie feeling that someone was watching him and might wonder what in the fuck he was doing. He thought about it. He was heavy petting the grass, after all.
His limbs were still almost weightless when he walked inside where he found his roommate and girlfriend perched atop the couches.
Here he laughed uncontrollably feeling as though he was possessed by an alien life form, him being the ship, but without regard as to the direction the captain at the helm was going. Abruptly he stopped when he noticed that his walls had now been painted a tangerine color instead of pink. Vincienzo didn't mind so much, he just wished he could have gotten used to the pink first.
"Did you paint the walls?" Asked Vincienzo
User Reviews
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-11-04 16:33:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You suck dick like a pro. What's your point? STFU GTFO.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2009-11-04 15:51:29 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
you write like you're ESL.
stop.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2009-11-04 15:39:41 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
meh
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2009-11-04 14:58:22 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-11-04 11:08:34 PST (#)
Ranking: -2
Keep going, fancy pants :) This is funny watching you spend time on me.
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-05-13 04:55:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
needs more grass
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2007-05-12 19:14:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Apollo is right. this is absolutely horrendous.
you really need to get a new thesaurus and a better understanding of english diction.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2007-05-12 17:49:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
"Never had he seen such vivid yellow grass in his times but he was absolutely bespectacled at the way the grass rubbed his naked feet."
**
Bespectacled means "wearing glasses," nothing more. Nice try.
Submitted by 8track (user info) at 2007-05-12 03:39:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2007-05-11 14:58:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm starting to like this iddqd guy a little more with each review.
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2007-05-11 14:53:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"Just when he was starting to get sleepy a sudden rush of warmth slithered throughout his body sending cold shakily throughout his veins, creating a duality of feelings."
clumsy, mis-worded and just plain cumbersome and boring.
not a good start.
havent you got some pictures of you getting drunk to post instead. as sheerly banal and run-of-the-mill, its better than this.
stop butchering my language.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2007-05-11 14:10:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Har har, rob. I like to fuck ghouls, leave me alone.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-05-11 14:07:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What is a band o' ment?
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2007-05-11 13:07:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I painted the walls.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-05-11 13:02:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Must be handing out Thesauruses down at the trailer camp rec hall again.
Submitted by snag (user info) at 2007-05-11 11:45:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
OOO he called you Jamie again! If you don't do something about it you will lose internet cred.
Submitted by wookie (user info) at 2007-05-11 11:44:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-05-11 09:55:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
your writing is like it has been through babelfish a few times.
----------------------------------------
It's like, you know a whole bunch of words, but not quite how to use them.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2007-05-11 11:37:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Jamie, the exit was 3 reviews ago in case you were wondering.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-05-11 11:30:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
you even spelt the title wrong.
and don't get me started on the whole lawnmower paragraph - that is the worst bit of writing I've seen since Method broke up with me.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-05-11 11:29:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
just look at the people who have rated this 'piece' you pretentious fag.
Offence meant but all of them are retards.
I, however, am a genius.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-05-11 11:28:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
CAT FIGHT! (below)
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-05-11 11:27:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
hahah okay.
it's shit.
Call me jamie aging and you'll regret it.
INTERNET THREAT.
Submitted by LovelyLady (user info) at 2007-05-11 11:26:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow, stunning literature.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2007-05-11 11:22:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Wow, Jamie, nice down syndrome you got working there. Ever feel like you're alone? I tell you what, that is if you are done playing like a little school girl yet, blowing off your steam, you are the only one who doesn't enjoy this piece.
Sure, it just might not be your thing, but if you could have read through the whole thing you would have realized that it was about a drug induced feeling which should be characterized by the feelings of both cold/warm, rush/slither, but since you are so fucking quick to jump the gun, you appear like a rampant retard right about now.
If you are going to try so hard to be "cool," well at least do it right, Sue Ellen.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-05-11 11:17:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Just when he was starting to get sleepy a sudden rush of warmth slithered throughout his body sending cold shakily throughout his veins, creating a duality of feelings"""
I mean just read that fucking nonsense.
It's complete drivel.
This is what happens when stupid people try and appear smart.
Sad really.
How can a RUSH (fast, sudden) SLITHER (slow, meandering)?
Say throughout some more.
So the warmth spread cold throughout eh?
That was the first fucking sentence.
I read no more. You're lucky I even read that.
Submitted by snag (user info) at 2007-05-11 11:16:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
catfight below.
Submitted by Psmith (user info) at 2007-05-11 11:14:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
like this?
Submitted by kwame_johnson (user info) at 2007-05-11 11:13:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
this would be retal.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-05-11 11:13:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
A) It's not a retal. The first lines of this are trying so hard that it actually made me feel sad for you.
B) Keep my name out of your mouth.
C) I am better than you at everything and in every way.
D) I rule.
Submitted by DirtyHarry (user info) at 2007-05-11 10:52:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Crazy
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2007-05-11 10:03:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Nice retal, Jamie. You would know about quality writing now, would you? Way to get mad over the internet comments I leave about how retarded and childish you act. Why don't you go hit the other 311 posts, retard...
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-05-11 09:55:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
your writing is like it has been through babelfish a few times.
Submitted by snag (user info) at 2007-05-11 09:34:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2007-05-11 09:12:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That picture is fucking cool.
Submitted by ChaosJester (user info) at 2007-05-11 09:21:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Drugz R NotYerFriend...
On the other hand, this reminded me of a surrealist painting.
...
Seriously though, stop the acid.
...It rots the peener.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-05-11 09:20:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
My bad.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2007-05-11 09:18:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
My 8000th review was a "no comment." Fuck me, lungy.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-05-11 09:15:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2007-05-11 09:12:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That picture is fucking cool.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2007-05-11 09:10:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Filename.