encounter with crazy (1529 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.7 on 32 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by loki (View user info) at 2008-05-08 22:35:33 EDT
I'm building a cabin on the land that I'm going to inherit. I've been talking about it for a long time and finally getting around to actually doing it. This is mostly because my dad, who is a retired contractor turns 70 this year and essentially announced that he's getting too old for this shit so if I want a cabin and I want him to build it this is my lucky summer.
So to this end we've spent the past two weekends up in the hills working on clearing where the road is going to go. We're all set now and on "the list" meaning that either this week or next week some guy with a bulldozer is going to come out and absolutely destroy everything that we wanted a cabin out there to enjoy.
I'm trying not to think about that part. Part of the road is on a right of way through the neighbor's land and my piece of this is 8 acres so it isn't like the entire thing is going to be clear cut.
right?
RIGHT?!?!
So this neighbor whose land we're building a road through...side story...they own the house I grew up in. The story there is that my parents sold this house and one acre of land with it and built another house. These people bought it from the people who bought it from the people who bought it from my parents and turned it into a bed & breakfast.
hang in there I'm going somewhere with this
This past Saturday after spending most of the day cutting down big, majestic trees in preparation for the pending dozer destruction Sam and I went up there to sort of check on things. This was the first time in this entire process that we had been dadless.
Naturally that would be the exact moment that the crazy neighbor would make her move.
We walked up through the right of way area and started up to our land when we saw her trotting rather entertainly (yes that is an adverb) up the hill to our location. She introduced herself if by that you mean accused me of being "Tommy's daughter" and started in on me.
The first concern she expressed was that our little road was going through her parking area.
Yea well see that is why you don't build something on a right of way.
Still though I'm not trying to make any enemies here so I told her that I was fine with her using our road as a parking area as long as they leave us enough room to get a Jeep through. If not I'll be forced to wheel up her lawn but I left that part out.
Then she expressed some concern that the road we're building was going to wash out her driveway.
which it won't
Come on, give the guys who run these dozers a little credit here. He's probably going to bank the road so water runs into the creek bed or something. I don't know. It isn't something I'm concerned about. About 30 years ago my dad had a logging road there. It has since grown up hence the clearing work but I'm pretty sure that dad would know it if there was a danger of it causing the road to wash out.
Then the real issue came out - she doesn't want the area developed. This would be because part of the "charm" of her little B&B is that it is located in a pristine forest.
Oh for fuck's sake. Seriously if you wanted to run a B&B and claim that it was in a wilderness then you should have located it on a larger plot than one acre.
I tried calming her down about it. We're putting this cabin right smack ass in the middle of my little plot of land because if I wanted to see other people, I'd stay in the city all weekend. She isn't going to be able to see or hear me even if I threw a ho-down up there.
Which I won't - because if I wanted to be around people I would stay in the city see
What a nutter.
She actually tried to scare us by using the L word - lawyer.
Oh yes indeed. She said that she just might talk to a lawyer to you know make sure that we're all on the same page and all. I think she thinks that just because I grew up in the sticks that she can frighten me by invoking an actual book educumated lawyer type. I told her that it might be a good idea. Hopefully this lawyer will explain to her that when you purchase a plot of land that is encumbered by an easement there is a really good chance that the person in possession of said easement may in fact one day choose to exercise this right to put in a road.
true story
There was also some crap about putting separate meters on the well. Whole separate issue there. My parents own the well but the electricity that runs it is on this B&B's meter.
We feigned ignorance. Not to throw dad under the bus but shit I didn't know what to do with this jabbering nutter.
My only concern here is that my parents live there and I don't want this person causing any trouble for them.
Dad is going over there to talk to them. I told him to tell her if she wants to pay for it, we'll dig a separate well on our land and take my parents and our cabin off that well and let them have it. She would be stupid to go for that since it costs roughly $100 a year to run the well, my dad gives them $50 a year for his part and maintains it. But I thought it would be nice to at least make the offer.
He's pretty adept at good-ole-boying people and I'm positive that he's going to be able to smooth things over. If not I'm going to tell her that we're putting in a ski slope and not to worry about the parking because I'll just let her customers use the parking lot I'm putting in at the base of the chair lift.
"say you do have good curtains don't you? I'm just askin' because we're planning on running night skiing and I'm pretty sure that the lights are going to shine right in your windows."
or maybe stop by and give them my cell phone in case my hogs get loose and head down their way
maybe I could find out if she's serving meals to the people who stay there and if so whether or not the health department knows that
carry on
ps I've had a few glasses of wine so this may or may not make any sense - use your imagination
In other news I saw a used condom in a planter by the train station today. My only hope is that this happened after rush hour when the train is on the 20 minute schedule as opposed to the 7 minute schedule it runs on the rest of the time.
I'm just sayin'
User Reviews
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2008-05-11 21:06:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ok ok I did evoke daddy but...well...you'd be amazed how well that works
(I'm the youngest and a girl - I win)
hate the game not the playa
Submitted by PukingDog (user info) at 2008-05-11 03:21:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I am just glad you still post shit.
Submitted by Lib (user info) at 2008-05-09 17:25:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Cyrus (user info) at 2008-05-09 17:06:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Drat. It's been a long week.
Submitted by Cyrus (user info) at 2008-05-09 17:05:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sounds like you have a lot of work ahead of you - good luck.
I agree with the armed monkey, my experience has been that the type of people that make veiled threats about lawyers seldom go thru with it. The smarter more sophisticated types just go retain one, give them $$$, and turn them loose to do their thing.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-05-09 14:44:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
What the fuck could you POSSIBLY be complaining about NOW?
Haven't you run out of topics yet?
Submitted by matnotharry (user info) at 2008-05-09 14:20:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I want a cabin
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2008-05-09 13:33:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Evoke "Daddy."
Weird how that works.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2008-05-09 12:37:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
*jealous*
is it a time share, or full pwnership? By that I mean, do I have any chance of ever "borrowing" your cabin for random weeks? (either summer or winter.. my girly would LOVE a summer lake vacation OR a winter ski vaca...) in fact... *Hopes are up*
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Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-05-08 20:43:58 PDT (#)
Ranking: 2
can i stay in your cabin?
you can use my ski lodge in tahoe in return.
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-05-09 11:13:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ground looks nice and soft
easy diggin for 20 to 30 holes about the size of zip-lok freezer bags
a few here, a few there
how many people live in the neighbors house?
damn tragic how people just up and dissappear in the woods.
Happens all the time.
I'm just sayin.
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2008-05-09 10:06:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I have a 1901 easement document in front of me right now and my God, is it tedious reading.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-05-09 09:11:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"She actually tried to scare us by using the L word - lawyer."
I get this pretty often, and almost always from desperate assholes who know they have no chance at getting there way in any matter in any way."
The assholes who use lawyers, especially the ones that do it for a living, don't tell you shit, they have their lawyer tell you personally.
You have nothing to fear about anything. Your cabin will be lovely, There will be "forest" surrounding it.
Submitted by moneyshotforyou (user info) at 2008-05-09 07:06:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
loki=auto+2
Submitted by sexualchocolate1984 (user info) at 2008-05-09 05:12:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Every night go round to the B&B in a ski mask and violently rape every visitor, man woman and child. Include the crazy woman in festivities and tie her up with a used buttplug in her mouth and make her watch.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-05-09 04:48:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Living in a destroyed forest FTW!
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2008-05-09 04:42:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
PS: What's an easement again?
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2008-05-09 04:41:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I did property law all last year and came out of it knowing what 'easement' means and little else. Good luck.
Submitted by Charlton_H (user info) at 2008-05-09 02:21:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-05-09 01:52:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
what _Dan said.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2008-05-09 01:03:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Look at your deed. There should be a section referencing your access easement. Go to the county courthouse and get copies of your deed AND the easement, if you don't already have one. Since you mentioned that your dad is good at Good-Ol-Boying, make sure that your access is legally drawn up and signed by the former landowner that he sold it to, rather than it being a handshake and a six-pack deal that won't hold up under legal scrutiny.
You're right. You cannot grade your driveway so that any stormwater runoff is flowing toward their house, but if you keep the road in just dirt or stone, stormwater runoff will be negligible.
Drill your own well if you plan to use the place for anything more than a vacation cabin. Keep it no less than 100 feet from the property line, or the neighbor's well. If their well is on your property, you have the high ground.
If the neighbor gets difficult, tell her that you're planning to build "An Off-Road Adventure Park". Follow that statement up with there should be no less than 500 trucks in and out per week, and that it *should* be far enough away so that the noise and exhaust fumes from the Jeeps, ATV's, and dirt bikes are within acceptable levels of the local zoning laws.
In property-type disputes, the L-word carries less weight than the S-word: Surveyor...even though both are expensive.
Make sure that you also have a utility access for power, cable, and whatnot, OR that the wording of your access easement permits utilities to be placed within it.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2008-05-09 00:48:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
maybe you should just let her know, "loki rules".
it don't git too much simpler than that now.
Submitted by Wildman (user info) at 2008-05-09 00:29:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
clear cut the bitch around her B&B along with the road and leave the stumps
we can't afford a wildfire now, can we?
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-05-08 23:43:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
can i stay in your cabin?
you can use my ski lodge in tahoe in return.
in other news, the BEST thing about chemo is oxycodone, 5 pills and a bottle of '96 Sancerre makes apollo a happy man.
Submitted by pandora (user info) at 2008-05-08 23:17:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
It never fails, you go out into the woods to get away from everybody, and it ends up your next-door neighbor is the biggest control-freak nutjob you ever met. Of course, that's probably why they live out in the woods to begin with. At least she isn't waving a shotgun at you and yelling at you to "git off her property", like my neighbor used to do when I lived out in the sticks. Damn hillbilly.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2008-05-08 23:02:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I've heard of spite fences, but spite roads?
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2008-05-08 22:59:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I do have a survey map. I have it memorized. It was drawn up by the guy who does all the surveys in the area. I think of him as "Marla's dad".
The woman is from "not round here" and say she sues, there is a real good chance that the judge is one of my dad's poker buddies.
ah life in a small town
It's all good now, but back in the day..."hello Tommy say I saw the kids today. It looked like they were heading out to go rock climbing - odd thing though I thought today was a school day..."
sigh
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-05-08 22:58:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Neighbors suck.
Submitted by spyder882001 (user info) at 2008-05-08 22:55:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I know you're mad at me right now, and I'm kinda mad too ... I mean, we
could sit here and try to figure out who forgot to pick up who till the
cows come home. But let's just say we're both wrong and that'll be that.
-- Homer Simpson
Brother from the Same Planet
Submitted by jasumthin (user info) at 2008-05-08 22:51:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2
no shunning for you
Submitted by X54 (user info) at 2008-05-08 22:51:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ha ha ha ha ha! Lawyers love people who live in the country. So do surveyers. (You do have a record of survey, don't you?)
"Come on, give the guys who run these dozers a little credit here."
Have you ever actually met one of those guys who run these dozers? Have you noticed how they're all missing at least one finger? Your neighbor's driveway is toast.
Nice looking place. Good luck with it!
Submitted by Hookhand (user info) at 2008-05-08 22:49:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The 2 was because this was enjoyable, by the way.
Submitted by Hookhand (user info) at 2008-05-08 22:49:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ugh. Thanks for making me remember a bunch of useless shit from Property Law class.