Benches and Bike Rides (1381 hits)
Category: Quotes & StoriesLabels: fiction
Rating: 1.59 on 131 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by orphelia (View user info) at 2009-05-19 08:34:45 EDT
The warning signs were there, I just ignored them.
Things that should have made me stop and think were instead explained away as stress, exhaustion, generally getting old.
Stupid things we laughed at, tiny insignificant incidents that became entertaining tales at dinner parties and nothing more than minor irritations to my life.
Like when I was making a sandwich and completely lost the cheese. It wasn't in the fridge. I checked the kitchen cupboards, the pantry even the rubbish bin. I have no idea where I put it. Gone. And yet from putting it away and consuming my sandwich and then wanting another was a time of just seven minutes.
There was other stuff too. The usual occurences of misplaced keys in the deep freeze, leaving the car not just on a different level in the car park but in a differrent lot altogether. Over flowing baths, picking the kids up far too late after football practice, lost wallets...
Actually, I just made all that up.
It's a total lie. All of it. I have no idea if there were warning signs.
See, I have been sat at this bus stop for 3 hours now and I really can't recall a thing about myself.
Nothing of use, anyway. Nothing to help me find home, where ever home may be.
Occasionally, as I sit here thinking, memories wash over me. Distant and faded, I don't know if they are mine of entirely made up but they comfort me.
All I have left in my head is imagination. it doesn't scare me though. It's easy to imagine you are not afraid.
And I know nothing, so how can I be afraid of anything?
You perhaps think I should panic but I am perfectly calm. For the first time in my life I can be truly still. I have no idea what my daily business is so I can't go about it. Perhaps I am late for work, perhaps the gas bill needs paying today, perhaps I am missing a date with a beautiful woman, perhaps I am missing the birth of my first child, my tenth. I really have no idea. feadlines, appointments, meeting and arrangements amy all be ruined.
I think I am successful. My shoes are italian leather and my linen suit is impeccabily cut. I smell of expensive french cologne and my finger tips are manicured and my hair groomed.
There is no wedding band but I know that means nothing.
All I have in my possession is 700 pounds cash and a genuine Rolex watch.
The cash is bound together with an ivory clip, I have no wallet.
No papers.
Nothing.
Panic is an option, but what would I be panicing for? Was my life worth panicing for? What if I hated it? What if everyday was a chore to get out of bed. Just going through the motions, the same faces, repetitive tasks to earn money for things I really didn't want or need and probably made me no happier.
What if I find out who I am and no one is pleased at my return? What if I am hated, despised by my own flesh and blood?
What if it's best for all concern I stay here, on this bench waiting, waiting to remember?
Yet I also imagine a wife, and our child, sat weeping by the telephone. Hoping for news, praying to hear the front door spring open and my footsteps stride through the hall, finding them, throwing my arms around them both, a tearful reunion.
Neither feels right. Nothing feels familiar. I actually feel nothing.
I am empty.
All I have are these useless memories.
At school, queuing for dinner. My plastic tray in my tiny pink fists, I am wearing an itchy wollen jumper. I know it was knitted by my gran, it has snowflakes on it. It's Christmas, there is a tree in the gymnasium and I can smell cooked mince and over boiled vegetables. Someone is pushed way at the back of the line we all surge over like dominos. I jerk my tray into Peters back. I remember Peter, he was the school bully, a big fat ginger boy with bad breath. He turns around and shouts in my face, little droplets of spittal hit my cheeks as he does.
'Sorry', I mumble, shuffling back, head down.
The punch to the side of my face is hard and shocks me.
I drop my tray.
Peters fists rain down on me as I cower foetus like on the parquet floor. I hear a teacher yelling at him feel him being pulled away.
Tears are rolling incontrollably down my cheeks and I have wet myself.
How did I get from that to this?
Another memory. Older now, but still a boy. I am riding my bike. I love my bike, it is red and shiny and I have bits of plastic on the spokes that chatter and clatter together as I pedal along. The wind is against me but this only makes me more determined and I push down harder, driving my feet round, round, faster, faster. I can't drive, I am too young to own a car or even a moped but this is the first time I can get from A to B without anyone helping and the freedom exhilirates me.
I ride the bike all day. I go to the very edges of town hankering to venture further but unable to break the solemn promise I made my mother.
My mother. Is she still alive?
Back on the bike, the passing scenery a green and brown blur as I zoom down a hill, my feet off the pedals no, just floating, floating, flying through the air carefree and smiling.
A voice jolts me from my revelrey.
'Mr Hudson! Mr Hudson!'
I look around, in the distance I see two officers running towards me, an expression of relief on their faces.
A cursory glance confirms that I am the only person around.
I am Mr Hudson.
In the oppposite direction, I hear the bus coming. I turn and there it trundles towards me, shiny, red, like my bike.
Holding out my hand I flag the bus down.
'Mr Hudson! Mr Hudson, WAIT!' They seem exasperated.
I take a seat behind an eldery lady with perfectly coiffered hair. She smells of lavender and soap and fresh green apples.
I can't help but smile as the officers giving chase stop running and start to talk in their handsets.
I am going somewhere. I have no idea what is there I have no idea if it is home but for a short while I truly have all the time in the world and I can truly be me.
User Reviews
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2009-05-23 18:02:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Then you activated the nuclear power plant and created atmosphere. Thanks, Arnie.
Submitted by RoadSong (user info) at 2009-05-21 13:17:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by TuTs (user info) at 2009-05-21 05:30:03 PDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This made me think of all the times I've thought, I could just take $100 and leave right now. Get a job somewhere as a waitress, make sure I don't use any bank accounts and no-one could ever find me, granted I have been thinking that since I was ten. I've always dreamt of running away, I don't know why my life isn't bad, just the idea of being you without the influence of home, family, what you do or don't have.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This comment means one thing to me. You need to go ROADTRIPPIN! It is a feeling like none other. Heading across country with no schedule and no set route, just camping gear and gas money. I always take my lil terrier to stand guard at night. It make me feel clean and free.
Submitted by TuTs (user info) at 2009-05-21 08:30:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This made me think of all the times I've thought, I could just take $100 and leave right now. Get a job somewhere as a waitress, make sure I don't use any bank accounts and no-one could ever find me, granted I have been thinking that since I was ten. I've always dreamt of running away, I don't know why my life isn't bad, just the idea of being you without the influence of home, family, what you do or don't have.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-20 17:04:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2009-05-19 19:20:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Goddamnit I miss camping on this website with scourge. GOOD TIMES.
I AM ALSO FROM PENNSYLVANIA
---
HOORAY!
hi dude.
Submitted by RoadSong (user info) at 2009-05-20 15:32:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I read this thrice. It is profound and I say it should be made into a small film.
I got my diploma in "Video Production" recently. hint hint
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-05-20 07:12:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
wow, this post spun WAY out of control after I left.
Orphelia's posts end up being so hot they sizzle.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-20 06:56:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
spammy, was actually to sage on this one but quite frankly i like my formatting if it causes annoyance perhaps a big block of text would fair better
i think it is the style i have adopted and i think i will stick with it
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2009-05-20 06:49:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I never said anything about your formatting here. If I were, I would say that your breaks for paragraphs are somewhat erratic. It seems (at the begining at least) that you are starting each sentence on a new line. It didn't bother me that much so I didn't mention it but I can see how it would some people.
Better?
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-20 06:20:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
or are you just whining cos i used your crappy post as an example
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-20 06:05:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Spam are you trying to annoy me today?
You are succeeding.
Well, screw me, if I wanna get annoyed because someone says 'formatting is shite' but never bothers to leave hints how i can improve it, my bad.
I am sure one day I will make the most adorable post for you to fawn over
Submitted by HeyJude (user info) at 2009-05-20 06:05:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2009-05-20 06:03:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-20 08:42:07 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/122214
Sage, absolutely no more than the poster does in the post above
see
anyway
at least i don't have to resort to itallics and bold type
which is the poor authors tools
and it makes it easier to read
thanks
for the input and POINTS!! though
:
)
--
unnecessary
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2009-05-20 04:04:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Boobs are the closest thing, in real life, to having actual Jedi mind powers.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-20 03:42:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/122214
Sage, absolutely no more than the poster does in the post above
see
anyway
at least i don't have to resort to itallics and bold type
which is the poor authors tools
and it makes it easier to read
thanks
for the input and POINTS!! though
:
)
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2009-05-20 03:35:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by RoadSong (user info) at 2009-05-20 00:28:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I spend ONE day at the casino and when I get back, everyone is yelling and insulting their Uberpeeps.
WAIT!
Same same.
heh
Submitted by Lib (user info) at 2009-05-19 19:40:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
About two or three years ago (prolly 10) I was a block over from my house and completely forgot where I was,I wondered if it was all the LSD I had done in my earlier life. What a ride.
Submitted by viciousness63 (user info) at 2009-05-19 19:30:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm a fan of yours, too.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2009-05-19 19:20:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Goddamnit I miss camping on this website with scourge. GOOD TIMES.
I AM ALSO FROM PENNSYLVANIA
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 17:22:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
jesus, are you fags still at it?
stfu.
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:44:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I am never a hypocrite.
I think people who are nasty to others on the internet are cunts and should be shot.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:35:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I have four accounts bitch, do the maths
and you would be gutted
you say ratings don't matter buut dude they CLEARLY do
you are if anything a bit of a hypocrite
sexy, but a hypocrite
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:34:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You took me wrong dear, poor choice of words on my part.
And I will make it up to you.
forgive me.
Submitted by Jack_Burton (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:33:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
OH NO.
PLEASE DON'T.
I DON'T KNOW HOW I WILL COPE.
THIS MOST RECENT LOSS JUST CHANGED MY RATING FROM 1.75 TO 1.74. IF YOU DO THE REST, I COULD POSSIBLY GO DOWN TO *Gasp* 1.73!!
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:30:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
you just lost all your streaks spammy, you fucking proper of websites my arse!!
Submitted by Jack_Burton (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:28:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I am a conundrum.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:28:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
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Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2009-05-19 17:55:25 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
for once Not rating the poster, just the post.
Well done.
--------------
I read that as - all your other posts are shite, pheeley, this is the first I thought any good
I was terribly hurt FALLEN
:(
Submitted by Jack_Burton (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:28:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
actually, my penis IS horrifically small. Does it have to be actual penetration to count as sex? because if so, I am still a virgin and sadly incapable of changing this fact.
:'o(
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:27:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i still cant work out if spam likes orphelia or hates her so much he now +2s her
i expect angry sex
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:25:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh Spammy, duck, you couldn't afford me.
Really.
It would be an easy and I dare say very quick job.
Like a blood test, one little prick and it's all over
Submitted by Jack_Burton (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:25:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I may just do it myself.
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:22:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Go right ahead Orph.
I wouldn't DREAM of telling other people what to do with their own ratings.
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:21:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It wouldn't feel right if I wasn't paying.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:21:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
thats scourge, i liquidated him
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:18:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
BEST COMMENT YOU EVER MADE EMISSION!!
:)
*shakes his hand, ugh what's all this gluey stuff, like wallpaper paste, only smells of crab*
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:15:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
95 replies and roughly 40 of them by scourge, circle JERK.
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:12:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
two back handed compliments?
Orphelia, I am surprised at you. You know I have much love for you, little one.
dont you see the harmony I brought to your comments when scourge was being mean?
it was all for you, so your post would get the attention it deserves. For it's literary excelence not for nonsense based heat.
Mysti, it's only natural to dream of me.
I look just like Caul only not as Canadian and not gay.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:11:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i will happily break your others spammy
and pop your cherry too, for free
i am feeling charitable
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:11:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
somewhere on this page lies my 5000th ever review. Passed by, lost and unreported. I am going to have a minute's silence in it's honour. I invite you to join me.
*trumpets*
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:09:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
A +1 would have sufficed though.
Cunt.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:09:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i aim to please.
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:09:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Thank you scourge.
*breathes easy*
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:07:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
all i want from you, orphelia, is an english translation of this sentence:
"Scourge, if you were to log on now and see this post with all it's gubbins you'd be hating on us"
log on where? what is gubbins? so many questions...
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:07:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
CAN SOMEBODY BREAK THE RIDICULOUS +2 STREAK ON MY LATEST POST PLEASE?? I KEEP HAVING TO CHECK TO SEE WHEN IT WILL FINALLY HAPPEN AND I AM FINDING IT MOST DISTRACTING. THANK YOU.
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:06:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
FALLEN, i had a sex dream about you last night and since I dont know what you look like you looked just like Caul in my dream.
weird huh?
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:05:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
FALLEN that is two back handed compliments today.
your position as number two is seriously under review
:(
Scourge, if you were to log on now and see this post with all it's gubbins you'd be hating on us
I knew you secretly just wanted to be in the gang
wanna do the initiation ceremony?
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:04:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
scourge, dont you see how you've upset your brothers and sisters?
there's no need for all the yelling.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:02:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
tragic?
is that a synonym for 'fucking awesome' that i was previously unaware of?
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:01:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hello Mysti,
There, there.
All this chaos on one little post, tragic.
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2009-05-19 16:00:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I personally have NEVER seen mystiamoon either rage OR argue, and I'll take issue with anybody who says otherwise.
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:58:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i cant tell you i'll get accused of raging and arguing if i answer anyone.
:(
hi FALLEN
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:56:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
WHAT THE GAY IS GOING ON HERE?
You all stop this nonsense now and play nice or I will take of this belt, and so help me!
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:55:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i don't eat chicken.
it's poor people food, you see?
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:51:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
it doesn't count if it was to reach a bucket of chicken Scourge.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:51:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
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Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2009-05-19 20:47:01 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-19 20:44:52 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
Not really, spammy.
I could think of much, MUCH better things to do but alas, I'd need real people to do them
:)
--
Well yes, but where on earth would we get a cheese grater and a live circumcised goat at this short notice?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
ASDA they are doing a BOGOF offer.
Scourge what is that in stone? God though, you are short (says the midget)
Muddy I am not obese but most certainly boring
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:49:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
well 5' 4" in heels obviously.
i'm 5' 1" in my sock feet.
so maybe a little love handle in there.
but i'm totally in shape. just last night i did a sit-up.
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:47:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Typical American obesity calculation below
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:47:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
no no no, orphelia.
i weigh in at a cool 324. that's quite slim for being 5' 4", i'd say.
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:47:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-19 20:44:52 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
Not really, spammy.
I could think of much, MUCH better things to do but alas, I'd need real people to do them
:)
--
Well yes, but where on earth would we get a cheese grater and a live circumcised goat at this short notice?
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:45:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I THINK she's talking about S-E-X.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:44:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Not really, spammy.
I could think of much, MUCH better things to do but alas, I'd need real people to do them
:)
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:43:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
well, you managed to hold off for 5 minutes, but then you just had to cave in to the pressure. they're doing great things in the land of electroshock therapy these days. you should look into it.
and me a bully?
hardly, i just like to call a boring, obese spade a boring, obese spade and a twicthing lunatic a twitching lunatic.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:43:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I never said I wasn't muddy. In fact I have made a concerted effort to lose weight, steady and slow.
the results are very pleasing to the eye. I have a waist, and ribs!
I once weighed myself on some scales at an aquarium and it told you what sea creature you weighed the same as and I must say you are bang on with the seacow. Beautiful creatures, very intelligent.
Haha I have no idea what scourge looks like, none at all, I just, like everyone else on uber, call him fat simply because it used to rile him.
Was there anything else whilst you are here, muddy?
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:42:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well this IS getting interesting isn't it?
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:40:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you're right muddy cause i have been doing that for the last how ever many months I have been back around. I have more than laughed at myself for the PAST. What do you contribute here besides bile and crude mentality?
fail.
2005 is not today but thanks for playing this round of "recycled insults to throw at mystia"
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:39:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Muddy, Mystia is right. you could at least come up with original and up to date insults.
That quote is so last year.
I expect better from the uber bullyboys
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:38:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
awww, are someone's feelings hurt?
orphelia loves me until some of my attention is directed at her and her idiot LIEKOMGLOL friends.
guess what shnookums? scourge is undeniably a fat moron, but he's dead on when he laughs at you for throwing that 'wicked burn' fat thing at him because you're a fucking seacow.
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:32:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
truth outweighs originality.
and the truth is, every time i reply to your crazy ass you'll respond again. a litle more frantically, a little more wild eyed, the voices in your head crowding up for the fight.
until BOOM, we get one of these gems:
WOW, YOU FUCKED HIM TOO??
LETS SEE, GARY, DONKEY, AND NOW HIM.
WOW, YOU ARE A WHORE IN THE LITERAL SENSE.
EVER FUCK ANYONE YOU DIDN'T MEET ON THE INTERNET??
NO WONDER GUYS DON'T CALL YOU BACK
ALL DUDES FROM UBER SHOULD GO CAMPING I'M SURE CORRINE WILL FUCK AT LEAST HALF OF YOU, ALTHOUGH I DON'T THINK SHE'S VERY GOOD SINCE THEY NEVER COME BACK FOR SECONDS AND HIT ON OTHER CHICKS THE VERY NEXT DAY RIGHT IN FRONT OF HER!
YIKES, TRUTH IS BRUTAL.
i'm just hunting for some more of that awesome that you fucking losers consistently provide when you get riled up.
prove me wrong.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:31:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Muddy I thought you had left?
If not, now would be a great time to consider it, I'm sure the loss would be gutting but we'd get over it. Promise.
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:31:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
thanks sage
i'm now going back to -2 all of your posts
seahag
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:29:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:26:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
whatever you say, captain insane-o.
******************
I mean, *I* snickered.
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:28:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for muddy originality.
nobody had ever said that before.
have any thoughts that are your own today, loser?
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:26:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
whatever you say, captain insane-o.
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:20:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
OMG I'M NOT FAT AND I HAVE FANTASTIC HAIR
go die somewhere muddy you crabby ass sour puss.
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:17:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
you're all fat and dumb.
especially scourge.
shut the fuck up.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:11:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
well orphelia, as the mother of 32 children you've probably heard this line before, but he started it.
heat tolerance, kitchen departure, etc.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:09:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
really?
i'm sorry, dude.
i figure you throw it out there, you've got it reconciled for yourself mentally.
i won't go there again.
honest injun.
we'll stick to fat jokes.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:08:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh scourge really, sgt is one of nicest people on uber, easy target, why not go and poke fun at someone less obvious or better still just bugger off you grumpy twat
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:06:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Show me the hole!
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:06:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:02:57 EDT (#)
when you start throwing personal jabs it lets me know i got to you, Jabba.
it's okay. don't cry. waddle home to your wife and find comfort in her bosom. as long as someone else isn't already there again anyway.
:)
=======================
The "insult anonymous e-people" game I dont do very well at all, obviously.
I gotta say that last line hurt though, soft spot.
WOW
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 15:02:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
comparing ME to YOU in ANY way... ugh.
the only thing that outweighs the ridiculousness of that is the disgust it inspires.
but hey, when you start throwing personal jabs it lets me know i got to you, Jabba.
it's okay. don't cry. waddle home to your wife and find comfort in her bosom. as long as someone else isn't already there again anyway.
:)
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:56:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:48:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
COME NOW, GOOD SIR!
CERTAINLY THERE IS SOMETHING ELSE YOU FIND PLEASING ABOUT YOURSELF?
FOR INSTANCE, I COULD EASILY IMAGINE YOU HAVING IMMACULATELY GROOMED HANDS.
PERHAPS YOU HAVE IMPECCABLE TABLE MANNERS?
YOU COMPORT YOURSELF WITH DIGNITY AND RESPECT IN YOUR DEALINGS WITH YOUR ELDERS AND FIGURES OF AUTHORITY?
SURELY THERE IS MORE TO THIS MAN THAN HAIR AND AN EASYGOING DISPOSITION? THERE MUST BE!!!!
====================
yeah, nope.
my hands are atrocious (sp?)
table manners are awful (fat guys usually spill on themselves while eating, from experience you know this)
respect for authority, yeah I guess. Elders, yes.
anything else? we dont want you to get winded now.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:56:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
naw... i think it's all out of my system now.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:53:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
perhaps i should pretend to get all moody and nasty, for old times sake?
i am sure i can open a can of whoop on your ass if you want an e fight
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:50:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:48:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
what's up scourgey?
ps i'd love a dick, it would give me such an excuse to be a grade A wanker.
that's how it works, right?
Unfortunately though, I just have a huge gaping hole.
So what's eating you scourgey?
---
oh, nothing really.
chained to the desk for the time being and it drives me nuts. i knew i could rely on you guys to rise to the occasion for me in my time of need.
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:49:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
OH SHIT!!
If Scourge is doing exorcisms I have to get the fuck outta here.
That green puke burns like hell on the way out.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:48:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:44:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:39:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
have you heard that thing about not being able to polish a turd? look at that head of greasy looking hair as 'polish' in this case.
----------
I didnt say the rest of me was nice, i've said many times that its a freakshow, dum dum.
Im just claiming that one aspect of my disfigured overgrown sack of organs is of "decent" stature.
I'm loving all this attention BTW.
---
COME NOW, GOOD SIR!
CERTAINLY THERE IS SOMETHING ELSE YOU FIND PLEASING ABOUT YOURSELF?
FOR INSTANCE, I COULD EASILY IMAGINE YOU HAVING IMMACULATELY GROOMED HANDS.
PERHAPS YOU HAVE IMPECCABLE TABLE MANNERS?
YOU COMPORT YOURSELF WITH DIGNITY AND RESPECT IN YOUR DEALINGS WITH YOUR ELDERS AND FIGURES OF AUTHORITY?
SURELY THERE IS MORE TO THIS MAN THAN HAIR AND AN EASYGOING DISPOSITION? THERE MUST BE!!!!
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:48:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
what's up scourgey?
ps i'd love a dick, it would give me such an excuse to be a grade A wanker.
that's how it works, right?
Unfortunately though, I just have a huge gaping hole.
So what's eating you scourgey?
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:44:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:39:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
have you heard that thing about not being able to polish a turd? look at that head of greasy looking hair as 'polish' in this case.
----------
I didnt say the rest of me was nice, i've said many times that its a freakshow, dum dum.
Im just claiming that one aspect of my disfigured overgrown sack of organs is of "decent" stature.
I'm loving all this attention BTW.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:43:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
who said anything about heat you unkempt, ill mannered beast? mind your Ps and Qs around me, you son of thieves and liars. OFFSPRING OF DEVILS AND BASTARDS. WHORE OF BABYLON! UNCLEAN WICKED SHEMALE.
THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU
THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU
ETC ETC ETC
now get your dick out and get busy dude, sgt is looking for his first (of he hopes many) gay experiences.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:39:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:35:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:25:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i don't hate anyone here. i just like rattling the bars here at the zoo to see which animal will lift it's head.
it's an attention thing, i guess.
and wee wah is a direct quote from you HAIR HAIR HAIR CAUL IS GAY CAUL IS GAY HAIR HAIR HAIR.
=========================
What can I say, you gotta put your best foot forward. Mine is hair. JEALOUS.
you dont have to guess, it IS an attention thing.
keep it up, you need your exercise.
---
have you heard that thing about not being able to polish a turd? look at that head of greasy looking hair as 'polish' in this case.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:36:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
oh there she is!
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:35:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:25:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i don't hate anyone here. i just like rattling the bars here at the zoo to see which animal will lift it's head.
it's an attention thing, i guess.
and wee wah is a direct quote from you HAIR HAIR HAIR CAUL IS GAY CAUL IS GAY HAIR HAIR HAIR.
=========================
What can I say, you gotta put your best foot forward. Mine is hair. JEALOUS.
you dont have to guess, it IS an attention thing.
keep it up, you need your exercise.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:35:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
what time is it in the magical land of fog and weasels that orphelia has her cave in?
i want to say horrible things to her about her heritage and her grooming habits. maybe insinuate that she has a penis just for good measure.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:35:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't see anyone heating this post but you scourge.
My fiction rarely gets noticed but thanks for the rating.
Nice to see you about Mystia.
Submitted by cheerios (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:33:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:32:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
there is no need to get rude now.
i come in peace
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:31:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
according to CHUUCH CHUUCH CHUUCH CHUUCH CHUUCH CHUUCH CHUUCH here, he is, you batshit looney tune broad. he's made dozens of reviews regarding it.
I ONLY REPORT ON WHAT I SEE, LADY.
but maybe he's just trying to line up a m4m encounter with the young french canadian fellow.
might i suggest PENNSYLVANIA as the perfect setting for your penis duel, WEE WAH HAIR HAIR HAIR?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:27:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
and now you've made me misuse an apostrophe.
red will surely yell at me.
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:27:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wait...Caul is gay????!!!
WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:25:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:23:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:19:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HOW DO YOU LIVE YOUR LIFE EVERY DAY BEING SO OBLIVIOUS TO THE SHEER IDIOCY WHICH YOU SPEW FFROM YOUR DONUT VACUUM? HMMMMMMMM?
SOME QUESTIONS CANNOT BE ANSWERED, PENNSYLVANIACHUUCHHAIRWEEWAHMAN.
----------------------
who was it that said any publicity is good publicity?
keep it going jello-belly, this is good stuff!
You cant "rile" me scourgey-puss. E-hatery is as dumb as you wasting your time doing all of this.
I think the "WEE WAH" is coming from you, big guy.
---
i don't hate anyone here. i just like rattling the bars here at the zoo to see which animal will lift it's head.
it's an attention thing, i guess.
and wee wah is a direct quote from you HAIR HAIR HAIR CAUL IS GAY CAUL IS GAY HAIR HAIR HAIR.
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:23:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
LOL @ scourge trying to take away my title for craziest all caps rant evar!!!
My trophy has 2005 engraved on it but i'm sure you can have that fixed to read 2009
RAGE ON MY FRIEND!!!
I love you!
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:23:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:19:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HOW DO YOU LIVE YOUR LIFE EVERY DAY BEING SO OBLIVIOUS TO THE SHEER IDIOCY WHICH YOU SPEW FFROM YOUR DONUT VACUUM? HMMMMMMMM?
SOME QUESTIONS CANNOT BE ANSWERED, PENNSYLVANIACHUUCHHAIRWEEWAHMAN.
----------------------
who was it that said any publicity is good publicity?
keep it going jello-belly, this is good stuff!
You cant "rile" me scourgey-puss. E-hatery is as dumb as you wasting your time doing all of this.
I think the "WEE WAH" is coming from you, big guy.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:21:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH chuuch CHUUCH
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:21:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
donut vacumm..... ha
haha
BWahahahaha
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:19:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HOW DO YOU LIVE YOUR LIFE EVERY DAY BEING SO OBLIVIOUS TO THE SHEER IDIOCY WHICH YOU SPEW FFROM YOUR DONUT VACUUM? HMMMMMMMM?
SOME QUESTIONS CANNOT BE ANSWERED, PENNSYLVANIACHUUCHHAIRWEEWAHMAN.
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:16:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:12:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
MY HAIR IS CHUUCH GREAT IN PENNSYLVANIA WEE WAH
WEE WAH WEE WAH
WEE
WAH
WAH
WEEVANIAPENNSYLWAH
---------------------------
you OBVIOUSLY love me to bits you big softy.
how do you live your everyday life being so pissy? You, sir, need some sort of release other than Uber, try golf perhaps. Maybe self mutilation? Readyyyyyyyyyy GO!
WAA.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:16:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
WEE
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WAH
VAGINA, PUSSY
!!!!!!!!!!!!!@@!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:15:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
OMFG BEN KENOBI!
YOU ARE SUCH A HATER!
HOW COULD YOU DO THIS!
THIS IS AN ORPHELIA POST!
AN.
ORPHELIA.
POST.
YOU ARE MEAN AND BAD AND HORRIBLE.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:14:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
who broke scourge?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:13:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'M JUST POKING AT YOU. I'M SURE YOU'RE A VERY NICE MAN WITH GREAT HAIR FROM PENNSYLVANIA.
Submitted by Obi-wan (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:12:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
meh
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:12:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
MY HAIR IS CHUUCH GREAT IN PENNSYLVANIA WEE WAH
WEE WAH WEE WAH
WEE
WAH
WAH
WEEVANIAPENNSYLWAH
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:11:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIACHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA CHUUCH PENNSYLVANIA
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:09:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
that's right, flounder!
i've seen the error of my ways and have decided that i want to be a part of the suicide inducing conversations that you wonderful people puke all over the front page every day!
can we talk about your hair?
or or or we can call caulaincourt gay!!!!!!!!!!!
or OOOOH, we can +2 things that allegedly have vaginas!
or maybe, god willing, we can mention that we are from PA every time anything we see triggers that thought!
or maybe just some inane gibberish perhaps?!
WEE WAH
CHUUCH
I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA
I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA
I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA
I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA
I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA
I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA
I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA
I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA
I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA
I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA
I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA
I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA
I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA I'M FROM PENNSYLVANIA
the possibilities are simply limitless!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:04:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was good, but the fact that you hit the enter (or return) key after seemingly every sentence annoyed me.
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-05-19 14:01:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
REALLY wants to be included below.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 13:58:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 13:57:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
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Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-19 13:21:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hi orphelia, how are you?
great i hope!
and hey, hi sgthartman and bell and other guys!
i love this great big happy family!
lets have a group hug!
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Submitted by Trishtopher (user info) at 2009-05-19 13:08:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by messmind (user info) at 2009-05-19 12:57:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sitting in the back of the bus...
Driving nowhere.<3
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2009-05-19 12:55:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
for once Not rating the poster, just the post.
Well done.
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2009-05-19 12:40:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Uber's up and running again. Yay
Submitted by w_t_a_y_s_t_r_m (user info) at 2009-05-19 12:25:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-05-19 10:49:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I liked this alot BTW
very "memento"
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2009-05-19 10:43:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
All the spelling mistakes in this made me moist.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-19 10:43:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
it's the typo's, bitches
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2009-05-19 10:42:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You want the truth? You want the truth? You can't handle the truth!
'Cause when you reach over and put your hand into a pile of goo that
used to be your best friend's face, you'll know what to do!
-- Homer Simpson
Secrets of a Successful Marriage
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-05-19 10:41:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
always breaking Uber Orphelia, WTF?
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2009-05-19 10:38:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You broke Uber you cunT