Good evening uber even though its midnight-ish, (rambling blogish with a late reply to Phallic) (1045 hits)
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Submitted by Apollo (View user info) at 2009-09-30 01:58:21 EDT
don't you think its weird how in English if you say 'good night' it means you are going to bed. So you say good evening, no matter how late it is.
A flaw, I think.
So how are YOU, Uber?
Me? Well I'm peaches and cream thanks for asking, my lovelies.
I'm kind of watching a documentary on the Science Channel where some astronomer dude is talking about how its 100% certain the Earth will be it by a large object at some point.
Which is true of course if you factor in the length time the Earth will be around and past history.
The thing is, like most of the doom merchants, he's so bloody gleeful about it. Those shouting about the sky falling in always seem to almost want the event to happen.
I spent the back end of last week through the weekend in California. The Jewess was having a follow up as Stanford, we thought she may need further surgery so had booked the flight back on Sunday after getting there Wednesday night. Turns out everything was great and I won't bore you with the details but it was a good as we could have hoped and she was free to go. So we stayed the night in Palo Alton then rented a decent car and drove up to Napa for the day, wine tasting, dinner, nice hotel and all that. Saturday we drove back down to San Francisco had a mooch around the bay, dat on the patio of our hotel watching the sun go down over the bridge.
A good time was had by all.
Recession is biting even in Napa by all accounts, we just rolled into town and picked what looked like the nicest hotel and called for a room. Our wine tasting guide guy was astounded.
I did my usual trick, if you aren't too fussed where you end up and you don't mind flying b the seat of your pants - call around the best hotels in town in early afternoon when you arrive. If they have a room available they usually offer you a deal because its last minute, if they don't - offer 60% of the asking price you'll be amazed how often they say okay.
Even better if they say all they have is a suite or a top room available offer them the regular room price + 20%.
Just something I copied from my wide boy dodgy scouse brother.
I'm bringing Loki back with this post, I know but WTF even my rambling is more entertaining than 99% of you other cunts.
One thing I can't get used to is the adverts for prescription medications here in the good 'ol USA. The hastily blurted list of side effects are often ludicrously out of proportion to the severity of the condition.
The punchline of the 'erectile dysfunction' (aka shandyitis) ads is always 'ask your doctor if you are healthy enough to have sex'. I mean for fucks sake, imagine bringing that up. (Pun unintended.) The answer by the way if you have to ask the question is a resounding no. No, you aren't. Now put your wriggly wittle worm away and what the fuck is up with your balls, Granddad?
California was excellent though I must say. Anyone who lives by the ocean, or at least a nice clean ocean, is very lucky. Getting the ferry to work across San Francisco bay every day must put a smile on the glummest of faces. Sure beats sitting in traffic on 1-45 gurning at your lap to let out the rage but avoid directing it at any trigger happy cowboy itching to use their new penis substitute.
Travelling back from San Jose the cunt on the security line wanted to check inside my carry on bag. I'd already picked the laptop up and put it back in. He almost grabbed it off me. Opened the clasp and promptly dropped it. Not far. maybe a foot.
Search over, I checked everything and moved on.
Today though if I sit with my computer on my lap and put my knees up, it makes a weird grinding noise. I'm secretly glad because I want a new MacBook and new ones will be coming out late October. The thing is my 2007 MacBook Pro with Snow Leopard still runs as fast as the day I got it, if not quicker, and does everything I want it to, so I can't justify it (to myself, not Ivana Jewovitch - I do what the fuck I want right? RIGHT? You believe me, right? I rule via bottom slaps.) but the current ones are sweet and the new ones are bound to be even sweeter.
Liverpool lost today against Fiorentina, I'm surprised Danger T Robot hasn't sent me some gay rambling text that overlaps into three messages, most used by his abuse of exclamation marks and blank space. (Another thing that I can't get used to in the USA is - get this, rest of world - in the USA you actually PAY (or it comes out of your minutes (same thing really)) to RECEIVE calls, how ludicrous is that?) I think he's got a new number actually, txt me sweety - I miss you. I didn't see the first half but apparently we were shite, I did see some of the second half but it was all a bit flat behind their defense. We need this Aquilani to a) get fit and b) be good!
What else, what else?
I saw some back and forth between Phallic and Iddqd and I think Phallic asked me about after college and into a career ( I couldn't answer because at work Ubersite.com is blocked but Ubersite.net is available but is read only, it's the blue balls of Ubersite).
There's no real advice other than, try things. Shit I'm only 32 dude. If you don't like it you can move on. Remember that its not beyond the realms of possibility (indeed quite likely) that those graduating now could live healthy lives a lot longer than now. I'm just saying don't let it weigh on your mind overly that 'this is for the rest of my life' when choosing a path.
My current 'plan' is to work my arse off the next 3-4 years, I am about to be given more shares in my company and we'll sell/float in that time frame. That will give me a good lump of cash. Not enough to retire on but certainly enough to pay mortgage off and good to college here to take a completely different career path.
Most people stumble upon what they do anyway, unless you've specifically trained for a career and even then a high proportion change their minds.
Not sure if there is a point or anything to take out of that, just my perspective which I think is what her asked for. Also, don't worry about the weed, you are clearly bright and intelligent and like a lot of people on here - smarter than the average bear so use 60-80% capacity and keep the stress low. Weed is part of that if you like it. Its the fucking booze that will fuck you mate. I've seen your fucked up posts and tales of debauchery and I've purposefully not commented for fear of sounding like these fucking septics 'oh man I drank eighteen million absinthes' but if I've not done more fucked up things and sessions or drug binges than you I've been there or thereabouts but that'll be the first thing you'll tone down. The thing is most of my generation, where I grew up anyway did that and my circle has the usual mix of successes and those scraping by. You've got a few years before you start to look like, to quote Christopher Rock, 'the old man in da cluuuuub'.
Yeah so that is pretty much it old ouefs - the dulcet tones of Baron Von Jew sails down the stairs, 'it's ONE IN THE MORNING, WHAT ARE YOU DOING UP? TURN THE TV DOWN! ARE YOU SMOKING WEED IN THE HOUSE?', the cry goes 'round the clubs 'apollo is stymied! He must leave his insatiable readers to yearn!'
Farewell, farewell.
User Reviews
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2009-10-25 05:20:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
shandyitis?????
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2009-10-02 13:45:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I needed you today. My toilet wouldn't work and I couldn't fix it. Goddamn shit cost me $70!
Submitted by Liquidice281 (user info) at 2009-10-01 12:02:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
You're like the pop-up video of 'uber' posts -- change the channel every two sentences. ( I'm starting to think this site isn't so uber....).
Sadly, this is the best thing posted so far so it'll save you from eternal -2 damnation.
Submitted by no1hasdis (user info) at 2009-10-01 11:58:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This rambling drunken blog post was still better then 99% of the shit on the front page these days.
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2009-10-01 08:44:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Nice.
Submitted by TuTs (user info) at 2009-10-01 07:08:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I have 2500 on What are JS Mills core arguments in defence of free speech? On what grounds would you agree/disagree with the proposition that I ought to be encouraged to articulate my views which some, even most, consider to be factually wrong?
All due in a week. Yawn.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2009-09-30 23:25:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-09-30 15:13:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
yeah, well loki was also more entertaining than 99% of these cunts too so that's no surprise.
i had a glass of white wine for breakfast.
i have a problem.
_____
You're out of white wine?
Fuck I've been on Uber a lot recently. Fucking essay season. I have 3000 words on "Consumer protection in the e-commerce context" due in 3 hours and I haven't started. ARRRRGH.
Submitted by VelvetElvis (user info) at 2009-09-30 22:13:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hats off. And by the way, what size is yours?
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2009-09-30 21:59:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ah the fauna's not so bad. sure we do have 8 of the worlds 10 deadliest snakes, but you rarely ever see them, even when youre in the bush. and lots of bad spiders also, but even then, the real bad ones are hardly ever seen, and even then theyre not so bad - i stayed a friend of mine's farm when i was a kid and living in the country and the dinner table had dozens of red-backs under it. as long as you didnt put your hands under the table, it was all good.
Submitted by PerkMan (user info) at 2009-09-30 19:18:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Though you hate me, I have always liked you football head.
Good advice hope life works out for everyone.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2009-09-30 17:19:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
...and your fear of iddqd.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2009-09-30 16:48:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
deffo mate.
all i have to do is overcome my fear of australia's fawna.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-09-30 15:13:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
yeah, well loki was also more entertaining than 99% of these cunts too so that's no surprise.
i had a glass of white wine for breakfast.
i have a problem.
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2009-09-30 12:40:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i mean that shit, fat head. if/when you get down here, you will be the last of a long line of pommy tourists i get utterly fucked up with.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2009-09-30 12:31:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
my this was a rambling drunk post was it not?
went to bed at 4, shitted, was up at 6 for work. Still shitted.
Hangover's starting now at 11am.
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2009-09-30 12:24:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
you know, being the once-upon-a-time king of drunkposts (which i now suck at), i really have to congratulate you on what is an excellent drunkpost.
im moving to live in queensland soon, so when you make your way down here, you me and d_r absolutely must get fucked up together.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-09-30 11:33:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
shut up berty, shut up!!
cinemas werent invented
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-09-30 11:31:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm still staggered by the earlier revelation, EI. Did you see the first Star Wars at the cinema?
Were you there when England won the World Cup?
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-09-30 11:23:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
good grief.....
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-09-30 11:22:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-09-30 11:21:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
what the eff is phwoar?
-----------------
It's what a british man would say if you bent down to pick something up in front of him.
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-09-30 11:21:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
what the eff is phwoar?
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-09-30 11:20:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2009-09-30 08:16:41 PDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-09-30 10:12:53 CDT (#)
Ranking: 2
it is a flaw btw...the good evening / goodnight thing.
-------
I agree. I just say fuck off. Works the same.
__________
You rock. I would drink beer with you.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2009-09-30 11:16:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-09-30 10:12:53 CDT (#)
Ranking: 2
it is a flaw btw...the good evening / goodnight thing.
-------
I agree. I just say fuck off. Works the same.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-09-30 11:14:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ducky , phwoar
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-09-30 11:12:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
it is a flaw btw...the good evening / goodnight thing.
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-09-30 11:11:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
post.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-09-30 11:09:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
just post your ass shlongy
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2009-09-30 11:01:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Just ignore the part on the attachment that says "virus"...That's just the name of mone of the songs.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2009-09-30 11:00:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
We have 2, recorded in the last couple of months...want me to email them to you?
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2009-09-30 10:58:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2009-09-30 10:36:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
DO YOU WANT SHLONGY TO POST SOMETHING??? <
===
sure, some cliches unreleased songs would be great!
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2009-09-30 10:53:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
OK...That's one vote.
If I get just 99 more "affirmatives", I think I can muster something pretty shitty up for the enjoyment of Uber.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2009-09-30 10:39:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That would be great, Shlongy.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2009-09-30 10:36:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
DO YOU WANT SHLONGY TO POST SOMETHING???
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2009-09-30 10:04:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
bloggish but uber needs posts
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2009-09-30 09:52:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Gay blog.
I am 32 as well and can;t fathom going back to school unless I was loaded and only doing it for personal amusement.
Would always like to get a degree in physics.
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2009-09-30 09:42:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
A bit of seriousness here. I love Uber because it is a constant reminder of just how together many of you are - at such young ages. Unfortunately, it took me a little longer. But coming here always restores my faith in the future - I realize that there are still people ON THE FUCKING PLANET that are not irrevocably damaged or brain dead.
Good news on your wife. Glad to hear the harpy has a few good years left
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2009-09-30 07:33:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
STFU, Loki.
Submitted by TuTs (user info) at 2009-09-30 07:23:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I've been coming here seven years and I'm still not thirty.
Submitted by Dervel (user info) at 2009-09-30 06:58:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Isn't everyone on here over 30 by now?
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2009-09-30 06:45:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"...Danger T Robot hasn't sent me some gay rambling text that overlaps into three messages, most used by his abuse of exclamation marks and blank space."
Ahahahaha! That's him to a T. His e-mails also are indecipherable.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-09-30 06:34:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Toe, you better watch out......uncle EI is gunning for you
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-09-30 06:34:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
whether i have a mortgage or a responsible job is another matter.
however I do have a big TV and a new haircut.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-09-30 06:30:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
*Imagines EI with a mortgage and job where he acts in a responsible manner*
... Nahhh! You're never 30!
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2009-09-30 06:25:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-09-30 06:12:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
shut it toe you saggy, down by your kneecaps scrubber. Apollo and I are wise and respected individuals.
---
I still love you EI.
and don't call me saggy. I'm still springy and can outrun you and your walking stick any day..
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-09-30 06:25:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
none of your business
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-09-30 06:18:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
EI is over 30?
Really?
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-09-30 06:12:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
shut it toe you saggy, down by your kneecaps scrubber. Apollo and I are wise and respected individuals.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2009-09-30 05:56:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
EI is just as ancient as Apollo. They should form a brotherhood. 'The Old Farts Club' with a logo and certificates and such.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-09-30 05:43:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-09-30 10:24:43 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Gayvid = Emission Impossible.
He particularly doesn't like apollo since old (32! Perhaps I should say ancient) big head said nobody could take EI seriously. Not even his own mother.
---------
:( i love apollo
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-09-30 05:24:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Gayvid = Emission Impossible.
He particularly doesn't like apollo since old (32! Perhaps I should say ancient) big head said nobody could take EI seriously. Not even his own mother.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2009-09-30 05:14:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
That was addressed to the Gayvid one, btw.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2009-09-30 05:14:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
YOU'RE A GREAT ALTER AND OBVIOUSLY SUCH A COOL GUY THAT YOUR ORIGINAL TIME ON UBERSITE NO DOUBT WENT REALLY WELL AND YOU WERE REALLY POPULAR, RIGHT
Submitted by Gayvid_Gerrold (user info) at 2009-09-30 05:12:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2009-09-30 04:22:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2009-09-30 03:04:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm pissed because my new-old TV doesn't have closed captioning so I can't watch M*A*S*H on mute, what the fuck?!
---
I've just decided that you are the coolest person on the planet right now. You hold that crown until someone comes up with something better - and I have doubts that could happen.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-09-30 04:21:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
The taxman laughs at the butcher when he wastes the pig's squeal.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-09-30 04:16:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Lucas......Aurelio....
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-09-30 04:06:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This morning I gave praise to the enduring train industry. Thanks to them I'll always have the option of lying down meekly on the tracks in the dead of night.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2009-09-30 03:31:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Apollo has turned into that kindly but strange old man at the pub who offers you life advice. Which you of course scoff at, at the time, but then it turns out to be true......
Although weird english thing, my mate has spent the past 6 years in London and ever since he's come back to NZ he keeps going 'You right'? apparantly that is some kind of 'greeting' over there. Whenever he says it to me I either check my clothing to make sure I'm not exposed in any way - or I talk drivel about my crap day 'not i'm not alright.. blah blah blah'
Damn Poms.
Bruv
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2009-09-30 03:04:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm pissed because my new-old TV doesn't have closed captioning so I can't watch M*A*S*H on mute, what the fuck?!
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2009-09-30 02:50:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sweet. I'm sure the drinking will settle down naturally over the next few years. I already drink way less regularly than before considering now I work Wednesday and weekend nights, only thing is I still drink till i can't move, but I'm sure that'll pass too.
Submitted by Cakes (user info) at 2009-09-30 02:49:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Mercury is in retrograde right now—- please tilt your head to the left just a tad. Thanks.
Submitted by TuTs (user info) at 2009-09-30 02:42:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
apollo is stymied! He must leave his insatiable readers to yearn!
Go and give her candy, then she might let you stay up.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2009-09-30 02:33:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice work Bloggy McBlogpants.