"If I cum now, will it be too soon" or why guys are quiet in bed (710275 hits)
Category: Science & EnvironmentalRating: 1.64 on 600 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Jon Elkins <jonukah.at.aol.com> (View user info) at 2003-11-04 23:17:40 EST
I was once having a conversation with Jesus and our girlfriends and Razor's house, and an interesting subject came up. (And yes, I purposely included the name of an uberuser guru in a pale attempt to gain popularity) Anyway, someone asked, "Why are guys so quiet in bed." And while this is by no means true for all guys, here is my answer.
Guys are quiet in bed because we are too busy thinking. You heard me right. Thinking. Deep thoughts. You see, it seems to generally the guy's job, (at least in my experience) to make the girl feel as good as possible and have sweet, sweet orgasms. The girl, on the other hand, is generally content to just lay back and see what I've got to offer. Again, I can't speak for anyone else, this is just in my personal experience.
Not only am I thinking during sex, I am multi-tasking. My neuro-net processor of a brain is pounding algorithms as fast as my penis is pounding pussy.
Just what is going through my head during sex? Like the moon, this is a frontier so far journeyed only by man. But here is a small window of what goes on in my head during sex:
"Alright, time for some action"
"I hope I don't fuck up this time"
"Is that the right hole?"
"Oh wait, there it is"
"All right, lets start out slow"
It isn't long before my thoughts turn into a quiet panic.
BRAIN: "Damn, she just moved."
BRAIN: "Did I do something right, or did I hurt her"
<soft moaning starts>
BRAIN: "She's making noises!"
BRAIN: "Pain noises or pleasure noises?"
BRAIN: "Let try stepping up the pace a little"
<increased moaning"
BRAIN: "More noises, I pretty sure that's pleasure now"
BRAIN: "Oh yeah, she's starting to flush, I like that"
BRAIN: "Lets try changing the angle a bit"
.............................
BRAIN: "Nope, didn't like that"
<Moans quieting>
BRAIN: "Damn, what was I doing before?"
BRAIN: "Fuck it, lets try a different position"
WOMAN: "OUCH!"
BRAIN: "Yeah....that one was definitely pain>
WOMAN: "What are you doing?"
BRAIN: "Mayday! Mayday!"
BRAIN: "Decrease Velocity!"
BRAIN: "Open flaps"
BRAIN: "Landing gear engaged"
BRAIN: "Disengage primary thrusters"
BRAIN: "Systems check"
ME: "You allright?"
WOMAN: "Uh....Yeah"
BRAIN: "No system damage"
ME: "Allright, lets try this again"
—five minutes later....computer pretty much takes over—
BRAIN: "Allright, back on track"
<Moans increasing in volume and frequency>
BRAIN: "Target in sight, hold position"
<Full body blush commencing>
BRAIN: "C'mon.......C'mon"
<Back arching>
BRAIN: "Hold it......Hold it....."
COMPUTER: WARNING! WARNING!
COMPUTER: ERR-ERR-ERR
BRAIN: "Oh shit"
COMPUTER: SYSTEM OVERLOAD IMMINENT
BRAIN: "Oh shit, not yet!"
<Moaning above 80 decibals>
BRAIN: "Just a little longer"
COMPUTER: DANGER HULL INTEGRITY
COMPUTER: SYSTEM OVERLOAD COMMENCING
BRAIN: "FUCK! I'm not going to make it"
BRAIN: "Pull out and prepare for manual override"
COMPUTER: SYSTEM OVERLOAD __________
BRAIN: "Pull out, pull out"
COMPUTER: AUTO PILOT ENGAGED
BRAIN: "NO! UNENGAGE! UNENGAGE!"
COMPUTER: TARGET LOCKED....TARGET LOCKED
BRAIN: "If I cum now, will it be too soon?"
BRAIN: "If I cum now, will it be too soon?"
BRAIN: "If I cum now, will it be too soon?"
COMPUTER: <Target heart rate reached>
COMPUTER: <Breathing nominal>
BRAIN: "Must....hold....on"
COMPUTER: <FEMALE ORGASM COMMENCING>
BRAIN: "can't.....hold it"
COMPUTER: <FEMALE ORGASM COMMENCING>
BRAIN: "Its out of my control, its in God's hands now"
COMPUTER: "PRIMARY VALVE: EJACULATING"
<keeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrr SPLAT!>
COMPUTER: "AUTOMATIC SYSTEM SHUT DOWN: COMMENCING"
<THUD>
WOMAN: "Honey, are you alright?"
ME: Yeah.....my head hurts...."
WOMAN: "Sorry" <blush>
ME: No, the other head"
WOMAN: "What?"
ME: Nothing"
ME: Did you cum"
WOMAN: "What, you didn't notice"
ME: Actually, I was kinda too busy to notice"
WOMAN: "You're so weird"
ME: You should try being the pilot next time"
WOMAN: "Get off me, I need to pee"
Do you ever find that pre-orgasm expression on a guys face funny?
Ever wonder what he's feeling"
Its not pain
Its not pleasure
It is deep, hard, seething thought.
User Reviews
Submitted by nargles (user info) at 2008-10-09 17:39:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you think way too much
Submitted by simplemindedhafwit (user info) at 2008-10-09 09:48:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
very amusing but I'm a little confused. What does Cat Stevens have to do with it?
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2008-09-15 00:26:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by jennifromthebenny (user info) at 2008-08-13 15:30:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
the picture really sets the mood for me...
Submitted by English_Master (user info) at 2008-07-27 22:16:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I concur entirely.
Well put, sir.
Submitted by NAKEDMAMMAL (user info) at 2008-07-23 23:27:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
If your lady complains that your too quiet in bed all you have to do is wait til next time your going at it then, as you reach splowage point, let out the most beastial, thunderous, wookie roar you can muster - make sure you muster enough bass from your diaphram to literally cause ornaments to topple from shelves, and colons to prolapse.
This shit needs to be loud and prolonged enough to sound like some sort of pavarroti/chewbacca hybrid warriors battlecry.
She'l love it.
Submitted by Majik_Marker (user info) at 2008-05-18 08:44:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
For the first few times in sex you just think about doing it.
Submitted by matnotharry (user info) at 2008-05-05 17:36:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by cerpin_taxt (user info) at 2008-02-27 14:27:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
i usually end up trying to count by 7's or 13's or think something that totally turns me off.
like tuna fish. yuck
-----
Prime numbers work a treat. When you know them by heart go backwards from 200. Or just get better at sex, whatever.
Submitted by loan_officer (user info) at 2008-03-30 13:02:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by skyler (user info) at 2008-03-23 11:54:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
haha I dont like making a lot of noise. It is kind of embaracing lol.
Submitted by rodyarask (user info) at 2008-03-20 18:30:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by cerpin_taxt (user info) at 2008-02-27 14:27:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
i usually end up trying to count by 7's or 13's or think something that totally turns me off.
like tuna fish. yuck
Submitted by ScubbaStieve (user info) at 2008-02-07 14:08:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
...so why don't you at least give some indication that you like what we're doing when WE'RE the ones doing the work?? I mean, sure, some guys do, but most guys just kind of... lay there... and maybe close their eyes... start breathing heavy if we're lucky... I mean, soo many guys have told me they love it when a woman takes control, but I HATE taking control SIMPLY because HE doesnt respond. He'll tell me after that he enjoyed it. Mini-him will respond. But Big-him won't! What's up with that??
Submitted by Arnold_Benedict (user info) at 2008-02-03 03:41:12 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
YOU TON'T TELL ABOUT HOW GAY GUYS DO IT DO THEY BOTH THINK AND THEREFORE HAVE BETTER SEX THAN LAZY NON-THINKING WOMENS????????????????????????
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2007-11-30 23:10:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by idodeklair (user info) at 2007-11-20 16:15:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by BuSt3r (user info) at 2007-11-20 13:35:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yet more proof that the whole mating process is far easier on the female. They get to lay there whilst the guy goes through the mental anguish above. Still playing with tits is fucking ace...
Submitted by ShimishSmortion (user info) at 2007-11-17 20:52:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I've always wanted to give this a plus two. Now's my chance.
Submitted by DeMoNiC (user info) at 2007-10-28 20:20:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Striperella (user info) at 2007-01-19 16:32:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"fgrv8gunjltbgruijnokgthb" <~~ ok ... THAT was just out of line. Also...i don't like the idea of men thinking during sex. What ever happened to the good old days when men just didnt give a shit? I almost prefer it. As soon as you get all "oh no!!! I came too soon"..or.."oh shit...i hit her in the face"... you fall under the " I actually give a flying fuck" category, which falls under the "caring" category. Caring is for women. wtf is going on. ( i totally laughed )
----
I agree with above, however I think I was EXACTLY as the post described on my second and third times?
Since then as long as I get my rocks off, I don't care.
Funny as hell post though, was one of the earlier posts I read also before making an account.
Submitted by Raven2 (user info) at 2007-07-26 10:32:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
And I had always wondered!
Submitted by cmcconn (user info) at 2007-07-09 16:18:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Try the ABC's...
Submitted by Zeglamancer (user info) at 2007-06-18 18:15:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
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Submitted by Crystal_o_Brian (user info) at 2007-06-17 19:54:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I always wondered...... Curiosity sated.
Submitted by Malcontent (user info) at 2007-05-21 19:57:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Not true but accurate.
Submitted by dluther31 (user info) at 2007-05-18 07:30:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.essaybuzz.com
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-04-25 22:00:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by kutschelove (user info) at 2007-04-21 17:04:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I loved this! Read it a few months ago before I joined the site. Recently, showed it to my boyfriend and he totally agreed. Funny as hell.
Submitted by strwbryfanatic (user info) at 2007-04-06 02:51:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You have reached the end, now hurry back!
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2007-04-05 22:02:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2007-04-04 10:15:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-02-01 06:43:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
BRAIN: "C'mon.......C'mon"
<Back arching>
BRAIN: "Hold it......Hold it....."
COMPUTER: WARNING! WARNING!
COMPUTER: ERR-ERR-ERR
BRAIN: "Oh shit"
COMPUTER: SYSTEM OVERLOAD IMMINENT
BRAIN: "Oh shit, not yet!"
<Moaning above 80 decibals>
BRAIN: "Just a little longer"
COMPUTER: DANGER HULL INTEGRITY
COMPUTER: SYSTEM OVERLOAD COMMENCING
BRAIN: "FUCK! I'm not going to make it"
-------------------------------------------------------
Here, the man and woman's thoughts are remarkably in tune.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
hahahahahha
+2 for that
Submitted by strwbryfanatic (user info) at 2007-04-04 10:09:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I can't believe I never rated this!
Submitted by diedra5000 (user info) at 2007-03-31 11:54:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You know, I always enjoy reading your stuff. On the other hand, every time I read this one, I always wonder if you're really faking in that picture...^_^
Submitted by sideshow (user info) at 2007-03-15 12:56:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I read this a while back but never rated it. It is pretty fucking funny though...
Submitted by jojo747 (user info) at 2007-03-10 05:12:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
this sucks and you're a fag
Submitted by damunzy (user info) at 2007-03-03 20:12:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ass good an ass kicker ass all of Chuck Norris' movies combined! ass
Submitted by GemPenguin (user info) at 2007-02-20 21:10:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by deinonychai (user info) at 2007-02-13 03:03:35 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
What the hell is that thing you've pictured?
+1 to misanthropy.
-2 to you.
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-02-01 06:43:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
BRAIN: "C'mon.......C'mon"
<Back arching>
BRAIN: "Hold it......Hold it....."
COMPUTER: WARNING! WARNING!
COMPUTER: ERR-ERR-ERR
BRAIN: "Oh shit"
COMPUTER: SYSTEM OVERLOAD IMMINENT
BRAIN: "Oh shit, not yet!"
<Moaning above 80 decibals>
BRAIN: "Just a little longer"
COMPUTER: DANGER HULL INTEGRITY
COMPUTER: SYSTEM OVERLOAD COMMENCING
BRAIN: "FUCK! I'm not going to make it"
-------------------------------------------------------
Here, the man and woman's thoughts are remarkably in tune.
Submitted by Striperella (user info) at 2007-01-19 01:32:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"fgrv8gunjltbgruijnokgthb" <~~ ok ... THAT was just out of line. Also...i don't like the idea of men thinking during sex. What ever happened to the good old days when men just didnt give a shit? I almost prefer it. As soon as you get all "oh no!!! I came too soon"..or.."oh shit...i hit her in the face"... you fall under the " I actually give a flying fuck" category, which falls under the "caring" category. Caring is for women. wtf is going on. ( i totally laughed )
Submitted by cshape (user info) at 2007-01-07 09:06:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for having a conversation with a house.
Submitted by konohasaiyajin (user info) at 2007-01-01 19:20:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Funny every time I read it.
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2006-12-29 16:57:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
this never gets old.
Submitted by hot_pocket (user info) at 2006-12-29 16:28:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
BRAIN: "Pull out and prepare for manual override"
Submitted by dwype (user info) at 2006-12-26 00:04:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2006-12-15 16:02:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
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Submitted by cigarettefun (user info) at 2006-11-30 01:29:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
yup, that just about sums up sex...as a deranged pilot...fuckin right!
Submitted by EdaphonE (user info) at 2006-11-25 09:11:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Brilliant.
Submitted by Girlwithaclue (user info) at 2006-11-03 17:52:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fucking priceless!!
Submitted by Newty (user info) at 2006-11-03 16:55:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
wated to rate this for so long. THIS IS SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO FUNNY!
Submitted by ilikeyoghurt (user info) at 2006-10-30 14:26:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Haha! Tooootally.
Submitted by lechuza (user info) at 2006-10-26 00:42:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
that O-face do is handy
Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2006-10-15 21:41:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
JON'S GIRLFRIEND BROKE UP WITH HIM HA HA HA.
I am telling you this because he told me to fuck off on AIM.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-10-05 16:22:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Don't think I've EVER rated this...
Submitted by mynameisandy (user info) at 2006-10-05 03:39:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Beautifully true.
Submitted by kbs050 (user info) at 2006-10-02 18:36:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Funny shit!
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2006-09-28 01:35:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Don't think I've ever reviewed this.
Submitted by FlakMonkey (user info) at 2006-09-28 01:13:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by iradney (user info) at 2006-09-23 10:13:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
read this about a dozen times
and i wouldn't mind seeing that O face in real life ;)
Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2006-09-23 09:37:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Auto Jonukah +2
Submitted by JediMasterJambi (user info) at 2006-09-13 04:39:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Kicker of all ass, a title indeed worthy of the plethora of wisdom and knowledge. You good sir, are an Einstein ahead of his time. May you beer be blessed with the touch of Jesus and your stolen 7-11 junk foods enchanted by Budda.
Submitted by UnderOathMeal (user info) at 2006-08-29 23:53:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Sockster (user info) at 2006-08-23 02:51:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh Jesus Christ.
I think this is the very coolest thing I have ever read.
Submitted by Lianne260987 (user info) at 2006-08-16 05:29:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ive always wanted 2 no what lads were thinkin when they were in bed! i wonder if its true for all lad?
Oh and I totally agree, all I did was type "Bored" in Google and im hooked! It certainly makes my day more interesting.
Submitted by saxon4eva (user info) at 2006-08-14 10:11:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was one of teh first posts that i read on uber so it seemed fitting that i rate this first.
<<<<<<<<FUNNY AS FCUK NO EXCEPTIONS>>>>>>
THANKS TO A quick GOOGLE "Bored at work" I am Now hooked on teh uber. Thank you UBER..and all
posters. You make my work day funny, insightful and in some cases HORNY AS HELL. Thank you one and all.
Submitted by hot_pocket (user info) at 2006-08-10 22:19:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ive read this a million times and not rated it yet
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-07-26 00:26:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I didn't even bring it down .01.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-07-26 00:25:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
-2die
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-07-21 21:16:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No, I don't.
But I'd be happy to stomp on your face a few times...very secretly.
Submitted by Life101 (user info) at 2006-07-21 20:26:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-07-21 20:22:00 (#)
Ranking: -2
This post sucked dick the first time I rated it, back in 1974.
----------------------
Shlongy wants attention everyone!
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-07-21 20:22:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This post sucked dick the first time I rated it, back in 1974.
Submitted by Antioxident (user info) at 2006-07-21 19:35:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
PLUS FUCKING TWO
Submitted by Life101 (user info) at 2006-07-11 17:33:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Still funny every time.
Submitted by t_man69 (user info) at 2006-07-05 04:03:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
still makes me laugh even if i see the title
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2006-06-25 02:58:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
If I cum now, will it be too soon" or why guys are quiet in bed (489001 hits)
Submitted by ThineJericho (user info) at 2006-06-25 02:01:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"If I cum now, will it be too soon" or why guys are quiet in bed (499985 hits)
Mmhmm.
Submitted by Bundaberg (user info) at 2006-05-28 09:15:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-05-26 11:39:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"If I cum now, will it be too soon" or why guys are quiet in bed (489001 hits)
Submitted by Lennes (user info) at 2006-05-11 19:22:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I can't say I've yet experianced this. However, I do fit in a lot of practice.
Submitted by SidewinderGunnar (user info) at 2006-05-10 13:28:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Holy fuck that is some funy shit. :D
Submitted by sinna (user info) at 2006-05-10 12:37:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Still funny as hell.
Submitted by a_reader (user info) at 2006-05-10 12:08:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
if you really want this to be number 1 again, it isn't that difficult: just start fucking spamming. call greening, i'm sure that he can get it done.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-04-27 12:31:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.helpwinthisbet.com
Submitted by Hypatia86 (user info) at 2006-04-27 10:24:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeah, this was a good post because it made me giggle to think about what men think about for a sex when my boyfriend is fucking me.... I mean... yeah it was funny.
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2006-04-26 20:25:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2006-04-25 00:10:13 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2006-04-23 22:15:24 (#)
Ranking: 2
The Ultimate MS Paint: It... (677477 hits)
If I cum now, will it be ... (476274 hits)
This post will eventually be #1 again.
_____________________________________________
How do you gather that?
The Ultimate MS Paint is still gaining hits at least twice as fast.
------------------
There was a time when the same could have been said about P2P Networking, kid.
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2006-04-25 00:10:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2006-04-23 22:15:24 (#)
Ranking: 2
The Ultimate MS Paint: It... (677477 hits)
If I cum now, will it be ... (476274 hits)
This post will eventually be #1 again.
_____________________________________________
How do you gather that?
The Ultimate MS Paint is still gaining hits at least twice as fast.
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2006-04-23 22:15:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The Ultimate MS Paint: It... (677477 hits)
If I cum now, will it be ... (476274 hits)
This post will eventually be #1 again.
Submitted by Webered (user info) at 2006-04-19 16:16:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Maybe the essay, "Sex Ex Machina" is more off than I thought...
Submitted by TimTheBard (user info) at 2006-04-19 16:13:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Scary, but bloody brilliant.
Submitted by DavyJones (user info) at 2006-04-14 01:31:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This will always be my favorite post on Ubersite.
Submitted by sixthlie (user info) at 2006-04-13 12:26:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
its so damn true.
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2006-04-03 14:48:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think this is an appropriate linkwhore.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/86202
Submitted by Fungah (user info) at 2006-03-22 13:36:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Bow down before me, your new lord and ruler, and serenade me with a beautiful flowing chorus of insults and -2's.
dlfnsngr;osmtrgo;hwm neo;pj5w93ng[qpgeu8q jh5roq7uieswajnhgaqohwg 5ru9psyu,tsjpi5rexswau8ioswa0[uoju5qaoj tp0om8qaoq5ja q lnhgowsandlfnsn gr;osmtrgo;hwmne o;pj5w93ng[qpgeu8 qpw9ju8 n9oihv79opuiesgnjh5roq7 uieswajnhgaqoh wg5ru9psy ,tsjpi5rexswau8ioswa0[uoju5qaojtp0om8qaoq5jaqlnhgowsan
dlfnsngr;osmtrgo; hwmneo;p j5w93ng[qpg eu8qpw9ju8n9o hv79opu iesgnjh5ro 7uieswajnhgaqohwg5ru9 psyu,tsjpi5rexswau8ioswa0[uoju5qaojtp0om8qa oq5jaqlnhgowsan
dlfnsngr;osmtrgo;hwmneo;pj5w93ng[qpgeu8qpw9ju8n9oihv79opuiesgnjh5roq7uieswajnhgaqohwg5 ru9psyu, tsjpi5re xswa u8ioswa0[uoju5qaojtp0om8qaoq5jaqlnhgowsan
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dlfnsngr;osmtrgo;hwmneo ;pj5w93ng[qpgeu8qpw9ju8n9oihv79opuiesgnjh5roq 7uieswajnhgaqo hwg5ru9psyu,tsjpi5 rex wau8ioswa0[uoju5qaojtp0om8qaoq5jaqlnhgowsan
dvsfahbtrd'lkgbvewsam0ofiimfdohmgods
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jaez ju
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09vnjgi4opwjkmev9fomrfe jngiuoimgrimiofkm0iowremoifj8f irounrfhpn 98h e9pfhw7p9frfe
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fgrv8gunjltbgruijnokgthb yfioygfijBow down before me, your new lord and ruler, and serenade me with a beautiful flowing chorus of insults and -2's.
dlfnsngr;osmtrgo;hwm neo;pj5w93ng[qpgeu8q jh5roq7uieswajnhgaqohwg 5ru9psyu,tsjpi5rexswau8ioswa0[uoju5qaoj tp0om8qaoq5ja q lnhgowsandlfnsn gr;osmtrgo;hwmne o;pj5w93ng[qpgeu8 qpw9ju8 n9oihv79opuiesgnjh5roq7 uieswajnhgaqoh wg5ru9psy ,tsjpi5rexswau8ioswa0[uoju5qaojtp0om8qaoq5jaqlnhgowsan
dlfnsngr;osmtrgo; hwmneo;p j5w93ng[qpg eu8qpw9ju8n9o hv79opu iesgnjh5ro 7uieswajnhgaqohwg5ru9 psyu,tsjpi5rexswau8ioswa0[uoju5qaojtp0om8qa oq5jaqlnhgowsan
dlfnsngr;osmtrgo;hwmneo;pj5w93ng[qpgeu8qpw9ju8n9oihv79opuiesgnjh5roq7uieswajnhgaqohwg5 ru9psyu, tsjpi5re xswa u8ioswa0[uoju5qaojtp0om8qaoq5jaqlnhgowsan
dlfnsngr;osmtrg o;hwmneo; pj5w 93ng[qpgeu 8qpw9ju8n9oihv79opuiesgnjh5r q7uieswajnhgaqohwg5ru 9psyu,tsjpi5rexswau8 ioswa0[uo ju5 qaojt p0om8qaoq5jaqlnhgowsan
dlfnsn gr;osmtrgo;hwmneo;pj5w93ng[qpgeu8qpw9ju8n9oihv79opuiesgnjh5roq7uieswajnhgaqohwg 5ru9psyu,tsjp i5re xswau8io swa0[uoju5qao jtp0om8qaoq5jaqlnhgowsan
dlfnsngr;osmtrgo;hwmneo ;pj5w93ng[qpgeu8qpw9ju8n9oihv79opuiesgnjh5roq 7uieswajnhgaqo hwg5ru9psyu,tsjpi5 rex wau8ioswa0[uoju5qaojtp0om8qaoq5jaqlnhgowsan
dvsfahbtrd'lkgbvewsam0ofiimfdohmgods
sdtrpijotgk8esw08gjpj85ew8pg8j5eimg4w9pvmwo9pmg9opwe8j8tiwvj9 8pwjtg9p8jt9p;gwi9evs9j8vw0ojgf0ubj98hbg tjnyhet
jaez ju
dtk
ryjre5jnutfjnuyhgfjnrtnertybvyertbv
ewgt
e3wh46tyhdhye
onusdgnifventro9ugerunoigenuignw4ouneoijh guvifn muigonv4rikjhngnwe jkfhxnjikgnfv iodsuhnvujwnl uifhetr
09vnjgi4opwjkmev9fomrfe jngiuoimgrimiofkm0iowremoifj8f irounrfhpn 98h e9pfhw7p9frfe
fniu34` 8 fh97f8h987jn5iuhf bruyhg089hwuei ojg8vwsnoijvhtis lj8g90h4nwerwjh8g97iewausjhgr7tuinhwjtg08higt
gieuyfbiwgerop v jhiutvgj98uigntve908ghybvkotrkg9uin g tmrfjhiutgfe908 9hygbthfekdfjuiyghvfd8 9g7uiygfnujtg8vrfwgehjfojkgtr
t5gbrkjkigtjkhigtruijkiwr,f.oir90ouikgdef swouie is oui4w3 qirjkeki8gt9uo4ir8tiuyr gf-08hybvd0uygh3roe vf9i87uigref
fgrv8gunjltbgruijnokgthb yfioygfijBow down before me, your new lord and ruler, and serenade me with a beautiful flowing chorus of insults and -2's.
dlfnsngr;osmtrgo;hwm neo;pj5w93ng[qpgeu8q jh5roq7uieswajnhgaqohwg 5ru9psyu,tsjpi5rexswau8ioswa0[uoju5qaoj tp0om8qaoq5ja q lnhgowsandlfnsn gr;osmtrgo;hwmne o;pj5w93ng[qpgeu8 qpw9ju8 n9oihv79opuiesgnjh5roq7 uieswajnhgaqoh wg5ru9psy ,tsjpi5rexswau8ioswa0[uoju5qaojtp0om8qaoq5jaqlnhgowsan
dlfnsngr;osmtrgo; hwmneo;p j5w93ng[qpg eu8qpw9ju8n9o hv79opu iesgnjh5ro 7uieswajnhgaqohwg5ru9 psyu,tsjpi5rexswau8ioswa0[uoju5qaojtp0om8qa oq5jaqlnhgowsan
dlfnsngr;osmtrgo;hwmneo;pj5w93ng[qpgeu8qpw9ju8n9oihv79opuiesgnjh5roq7uieswajnhgaqohwg5 ru9psyu, tsjpi5re xswa u8ioswa0[uoju5qaojtp0om8qaoq5jaqlnhgowsan
dlfnsngr;osmtrg o;hwmneo; pj5w 93ng[qpgeu 8qpw9ju8n9oihv79opuiesgnjh5r q7uieswajnhgaqohwg5ru 9psyu,tsjpi5rexswau8 ioswa0[uo ju5 qaojt p0om8qaoq5jaqlnhgowsan
dlfnsn gr;osmtrgo;hwmneo;pj5w93ng[qpgeu8qpw9ju8n9oihv79opuiesgnjh5roq7uieswajnhgaqohwg 5ru9psyu,tsjp i5re xswau8io swa0[uoju5qao jtp0om8qaoq5jaqlnhgowsan
dlfnsngr;osmtrgo;hwmneo ;pj5w93ng[qpgeu8qpw9ju8n9oihv79opuiesgnjh5roq 7uieswajnhgaqo hwg5ru9psyu,tsjpi5 rex wau8ioswa0[uoju5qaojtp0om8qaoq5jaqlnhgowsan
dvsfahbtrd'lkgbvewsam0ofiimfdohmgods
sdtrpijotgk8esw08gjpj85ew8pg8j5eimg4w9pvmwo9pmg9opwe8j8tiwvj9 8pwjtg9p8jt9p;gwi9evs9j8vw0ojgf0ubj98hbg tjnyhet
jaez ju
dtk
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ewgt
e3wh46tyhdhye
onusdgnifventro9ugerunoigenuignw4ouneoijh guvifn muigonv4rikjhngnwe jkfhxnjikgnfv iodsuhnvujwnl uifhetr
09vnjgi4opwjkmev9fomrfe jngiuoimgrimiofkm0iowremoifj8f irounrfhpn 98h e9pfhw7p9frfe
fniu34` 8 fh97f8h987jn5iuhf bruyhg089hwuei ojg8vwsnoijvhtis lj8g90h4nwerwjh8g97iewausjhgr7tuinhwjtg08higt
gieuyfbiwgerop v jhiutvgj98uigntve908ghybvkotrkg9uin g tmrfjhiutgfe908 9hygbthfekdfjuiyghvfd8 9g7uiygfnujtg8vrfwgehjfojkgtr
t5gbrkjkigtjkhigtruijkiwr,f.oir90ouikgdef swouie is oui4w3 qirjkeki8gt9uo4ir8tiuyr gf-08hybvd0uygh3roe vf9i87uigref
fgrv8gunjltbgruijnokgthb yfioygfij
Submitted by a_reader (user info) at 2006-03-20 04:10:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2006-03-07 21:43:46 (#)
Ranking: 2
a_reader: I know... Same for me. I think I just did a terrible thing.
---------------------------------------------------------------
Nah... I was starting to wonder if the MVM would ever fucking change. I kind of appreciate the new look.
Retire now.
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2006-03-14 14:16:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
*the few) post
Fuck it you get the idea bitches.
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2006-03-14 14:15:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The first (and one of the few post) on Uber that really made me laugh.
P2P was on the top for a little while, for some of the same reasons the MS Paint is. But then people lost interest. This will always get hits. It will rise again.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2006-03-12 09:22:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
C'mon guys- a change is as good as a holiday.
Submitted by hairjr (user info) at 2006-03-12 08:05:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2006-03-07 21:43:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
a_reader: I know... Same for me. I think I just did a terrible thing.
Submitted by a_reader (user info) at 2006-03-07 17:47:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This post was #1 when I signed up. For almost a year, I logged onto this damn website, and every day, I was this atop the MVM. Until a few days ago... Thanks a lot, FTW.
Submitted by NerfHerder (user info) at 2006-03-06 17:01:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You're still #1 to me.
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-03-03 13:50:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2006-03-03 13:38:40 (#)
Ranking: 2
So this website looks kind of weird without this post as #1...
----
You are now my enemy....
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2006-03-03 13:38:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
So this website looks kind of weird without this post as #1...
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-03-03 12:09:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Chillax (user info) at 2006-03-03 06:56:18 (#)
Ranking: 2
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-03-02 22:04:31 (#)
Ranking: 2
This cannot be overtaken by the Ultimate MSPaint thing.
It just can't. My world couldn't take it.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Find a new world, man.
You'll need one.
-----
*cries emo tears*
It's about to happen. It's so close...
....Dear god no....NOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Submitted by Chillax (user info) at 2006-03-03 06:56:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-03-02 22:04:31 (#)
Ranking: 2
This cannot be overtaken by the Ultimate MSPaint thing.
It just can't. My world couldn't take it.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Find a new world, man.
You'll need one.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2006-03-03 06:21:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This is where I popped my Uber-cherry. I will be sad to see it leave the No.1 spot, which is sadly inevitable, much as I dig the MS Paint effort.
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-03-02 22:04:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This cannot be overtaken by the Ultimate MSPaint thing.
It just can't. My world couldn't take it.
Submitted by gloop (user info) at 2006-03-02 03:44:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
as said uhh... a year and a half ago by someone else hehe, it reminds me of Woody Allen's "Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex * But Were Afraid to Ask"... which = lol mb
Submitted by xanderd (user info) at 2006-02-27 11:56:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
like the metaphor
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-02-25 09:54:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by kclovebliss (user info) at 2006-02-25 09:21:56 (#)
Ranking: 0
No, that's Definitely jon... that mug is unmistakable... on a sidenote i think you're weird to make an account and say "i think UR cute and funny LOLZ and never post anything"
In short note:
Die
"i think UR cute and funny LOLZ and never post anything"
first of all i didnt say this asshole and i havent decide what to post yet about my wonderfully exciting job in the hotel buisiness yet so why dont you go get fucked and stop trying to make me out to be some drooling horny female i said the guy in the picture was attractive and the fucking dtory made me smile but not that it is any of your buisniess but i am a dyke so fuck off and die p. s. you are rude as hell !!!!! & next time don't tell a redhead to die it tends to piss them off have a great day ;)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Fuckin' A!! The above review is the epitome of the run-on sentence!!
Submitted by kclovebliss (user info) at 2006-02-25 09:21:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
No, that's Definitely jon... that mug is unmistakable... on a sidenote i think you're weird to make an account and say "i think UR cute and funny LOLZ and never post anything"
In short note:
Die
"i think UR cute and funny LOLZ and never post anything"
first of all i didnt say this asshole and i havent decide what to post yet about my wonderfully exciting job in the hotel buisiness yet so why dont you go get fucked and stop trying to make me out to be some drooling horny female i said the guy in the picture was attractive and the fucking dtory made me smile but not that it is any of your buisniess but i am a dyke so fuck off and die p. s. you are rude as hell !!!!! & next time don't tell a redhead to die it tends to piss them off have a great day ;)
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-02-24 04:02:16 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I'm a miserable prick.
Submitted by erosion_rules (user info) at 2006-02-24 03:59:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh yeah, forgot to rate.
Submitted by erosion_rules (user info) at 2006-02-24 03:56:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by VelvetElvis (user info) at 2006-02-16 03:43:44 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-02-16 03:04:18 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-06-25 06:28:18 (#)
Ranking: -2
hey look!
More n00bs11!!!1!
/
Cracks me up, the lingo here, nOObs. Son, it'd take one hell of a long tall glass of whiskey for you to even hear my life stories, and that would just be the start. You'd need more than that to hear the full of it. I've seen and done it all, sideways and backward. I've never considered posting such on the internet, I'd be called a liar then I'd have to start posting photos to prove things that I'd rather forget. Just be careful with that term noob. This is a website, nothing more, and 99 per cent of the shit you read hear is bs. Which, if you're smart, you already know.
Now be a wise guy and call what i just wrote bs. It's only right, though you'd be very wrong.
========================================================================
Translation: "I am a condescending prick."
Submitted by Donitsu2002 (user info) at 2006-02-24 03:39:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by kclovebliss (user info) at 2006-02-21 14:23:56 (#)
Ranking: 1
this absolutly made me smile and i bet you are really sexy when you arem't making that face or is that not even you ? ~bliss
------------------------------------
No, that's Definitely jon... that mug is unmistakable... on a sidenote i think you're weird to make an account and say "i think UR cute and funny LOLZ and never post anything"
In short note:
Die
Submitted by kclovebliss (user info) at 2006-02-21 14:23:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
this absolutly made me smile and i bet you are really sexy when you arem't making that face or is that not even you ? ~bliss
Submitted by rose_child (user info) at 2006-02-21 13:52:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
that was the funniest thing i have ever read...
Submitted by angel_2k01 (user info) at 2006-02-21 10:13:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
an interesting insight into what guys really think about. i always thought they are thinking "oh my god im actually getting laid, yeah baby, I'm a stud". Obviously it's a lot more intellectual than that!
Submitted by XoXFreaksRUsXoX (user info) at 2006-02-21 09:55:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
LMAO!!!!
Submitted by Doberish (user info) at 2006-02-20 23:05:10 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You suck.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/84167
Submitted by VelvetElvis (user info) at 2006-02-16 03:43:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-02-16 03:04:18 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-06-25 06:28:18 (#)
Ranking: -2
hey look!
More n00bs11!!!1!
/
Cracks me up, the lingo here, nOObs. Son, it'd take one hell of a long tall glass of whiskey for you to even hear my life stories, and that would just be the start. You'd need more than that to hear the full of it. I've seen and done it all, sideways and backward. I've never considered posting such on the internet, I'd be called a liar then I'd have to start posting photos to prove things that I'd rather forget. Just be careful with that term noob. This is a website, nothing more, and 99 per cent of the shit you read hear is bs. Which, if you're smart, you already know.
Now be a wise guy and call what i just wrote bs. It's only right, though you'd be very wrong.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-02-16 03:04:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-06-25 06:28:18 (#)
Ranking: -2
hey look!
More n00bs11!!!1!
Submitted by VelvetElvis (user info) at 2006-02-16 02:54:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Very funny, and would be +2 if not for so many hits. What i mean is it wasn't nearly that funny, not close, and your replies were't gold. Still liked, started readinng once before but never finished. You're alot funnier than me , though.
Submitted by Aztune (user info) at 2006-02-09 08:55:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
2 years after it was posted and this one still rates a response.
I read this at work and had to constrict my chest muscles to keep from laughing out loud.
Good stuff.
Submitted by ghost_bite (user info) at 2006-01-31 00:34:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
uhm.. forgot to rate the dayum thing. it's pretty cool, and i wasn't content to let it sit at 0.
Submitted by ghost_bite (user info) at 2006-01-31 00:32:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
lol! i've got to show this to a friend of mine.. she was teasin' me about this exact topic a while ago. no worries ladies, i've learned to think less since then... now i watch the clock (personal record so far... 4 hours! hey, take it easy, i'm still new at the whole "fu#%ing" game..)
Submitted by podium (user info) at 2006-01-13 00:20:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"If I cum now, will it be too soon" or why guys are quiet in bed (420420 hits)
Submitted by fudge_me (user info) at 2006-01-13 00:14:42 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I think guys are quiet because we know how stupid girls sound when they're fucking. Thikning during sex is simply involved too much. You see, it only matters in the intial part of the relationship, after that fuck the bitch and what she thinks. She's only there to keep you happy anyway, cos she knows that if there was no sex she'd lose you.
Submitted by a_reader (user info) at 2006-01-05 04:05:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
There are only 11 users on this entire site who have more hits than this post.
Submitted by Ditka (user info) at 2005-12-29 08:29:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I never thought of this as that great of a post. But it was funny.
Submitted by kimberly (user info) at 2005-12-28 01:32:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i read this when it was first posted, and i still think it's hilarious.
Submitted by refusenik (user info) at 2005-12-23 18:03:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by matnotharry (user info) at 2005-12-19 17:51:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I love this
Submitted by marblefluss (user info) at 2005-12-13 22:41:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Definately the Kicker of All Ass. You pwn. *bows dojo-style*
Submitted by a_reader (user info) at 2005-12-12 19:51:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"If I cum now, will it be too soon" or why guys are quiet in bed (400924 hits)
Over 400k hits.
Submitted by a_reader (user info) at 2005-12-07 23:52:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't think this got enough attention.
Submitted by spig (user info) at 2005-12-04 16:44:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i'd like to think that is v. accurate.not that i actually would know, being a girl and all. i have my reservtions abt how hell bent men actually are on pleasuring women though.i suspect most don't care as much as you...
Submitted by BeavisChrist (user info) at 2005-12-02 04:56:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Brilliant.
Submitted by katianakate (user info) at 2005-11-28 07:19:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Since I finally got permission to actually write stuff and rate stuff after months of reading Uber I always wanted to stick a +2 on this. Thanks for the insight. My boyfriend appreciates my inner knowledge acquired from here and I know better how to get him to hurry the hell up when time is pressured....!
Submitted by randomhero83 (user info) at 2005-11-10 13:25:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
HA HA LINKWHORE!
No, really. CLICK NOW, DAMN YOU!!
http://www.ubersite.com/m/78694
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2005-11-10 13:23:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"If I cum now, will it be too soon" or why guys are quiet in bed (380002 hits)
380,000 hits passed.
Submitted by Mike00295 (user info) at 2005-11-10 13:19:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It's still classic every time I read it.
Submitted by MrHappyPants (user info) at 2005-11-09 14:02:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/78654
Submitted by sizzlemctwizzle (user info) at 2005-11-02 22:30:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I understand the whole thinking, but I don't roll like that. I'm a little different. I can organsim alot so I come when ever I feel like and focus more on making the girl come, I can always come.
Submitted by bitterlemon (user info) at 2005-11-01 06:53:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-10-31 07:55:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Auto +2 for all. For me, a n00b, getting on B@W!!
http://www.ubersite.com/m/77872
I love Uber!
Submitted by Chinaski (user info) at 2005-10-30 01:33:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.democracynow.org/article.pl?sid=04/11/09/1526251#transcript
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2005-10-22 21:01:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
hey, how did this pick up a 90k hit lead on "peer to peer" so fast?
it was behind a few short months ago.
Submitted by a_reader (user info) at 2005-10-18 06:32:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/76836
Anything I can do to get a n00b to read my shit.
Submitted by DanielH (user info) at 2005-10-18 05:40:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The answer remains, and always will remain, yes. Unless you're alone.
Submitted by BiGTiMe.NeRD (user info) at 2005-10-18 05:29:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was awesome.
And the picture was a nice finishing touch.
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2005-10-16 18:41:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
random bob linkwhore
http://www.ubersite.com/m/73270
Submitted by TweakinIan (user info) at 2005-10-16 00:33:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Most definitaley.
+2 for being awesome.
-1 for that picture.
Submitted by coindon (user info) at 2005-10-11 01:17:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Absolutely the most realistic insight into the machinations of the male mind during coitus. Ladies- cosmo has it all wrong; that is what actually happens.
Submitted by tyronnicus (user info) at 2005-10-08 18:19:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Amusing.
Submitted by ipayparis (user info) at 2005-10-01 18:18:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I like to be quite because I don't want to wake up the neihbors. At least not with my voice.
Submitted by Barnymeinhoff (user info) at 2005-09-28 11:26:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Messy facial pics
http://www.ubersite.com/m/74342
Submitted by swamp_donkey (user info) at 2005-09-26 10:05:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Camwhore >>> http://www.ubersite.com/m/75879
Submitted by smokingloon (user info) at 2005-09-12 13:00:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Extra phat props for the pic of an "O-face"
For myself, I'm busy thinking about getting her off AGAIN (multiplied by.....number of times) before I decide it's my time. Then, I think of her younger sister, best friend, a co-worker....basically, anybody hotter. Fellas, ya gotta admit, no matter how hot she is, or even if you love her, you think of someone else at least for a few seconds. (especially if you've been w/ them awhile).
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2005-09-09 13:51:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What the link whore?
http://www.zen33652.zen.co.uk/things.htm
Submitted by shark25 (user info) at 2005-09-08 14:51:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What the Link Whore?
http://www.ubersite.com/m/74769
Submitted by a_reader (user info) at 2005-09-08 08:07:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have visited the most viewed message...
...and left a LINKWHORE:http://www.ubersite.com/m/71491
Submitted by Chillax (user info) at 2005-09-06 20:13:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2005-08-23 09:02:57 (#)
Ranking: 2
Frankly I'm surprised at the lack of attention this has received.
Thorpe, you legend.
Submitted by Technoboy (user info) at 2005-09-06 20:07:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
WOMAN: "Get off me, I need to pee"
So I'm not the only one...
Submitted by LaNDmAsS (user info) at 2005-08-27 01:10:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow, you hit on every single point. This is easily one of the most on point theories I have ever
read, and yeah I am drunk, but no matter, because this is amazing.
Good show, ole lad, good show.
Submitted by Jimmy_Esquire (user info) at 2005-08-24 17:44:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Women have it so easy
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2005-08-24 17:29:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2005-08-23 09:02:57 (#)
Ranking: 2
Frankly I'm surprised at the lack of attention this has received.
----
yeah look at the hits. pathetic.
Submitted by papaya_princess (user info) at 2005-08-24 17:16:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by pharmgirl147 (user info) at 2005-08-23 15:09:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2005-08-23 09:02:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Frankly I'm surprised at the lack of attention this has received.
Submitted by Calios (user info) at 2005-08-23 08:49:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Aitsu (user info) at 2005-08-18 19:40:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
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