Mad Cow Disease Hits Cleveland!!! (1031 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.27 on 12 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by angrykoz.at.suckit.com (View user info) at 2003-12-26 11:55:16 EST
This is more of a bitch session than anything, but it this incident made my day. Like every morning on my way to work I stop off at a Dunkin Donuts down the road from my office to grab a cup of Joe and a donut, my order is always the same; large cup of coffee and a single chocolate glazed donut, nothing special. It has become such a routine that I pretty much know everyone in the place by name - it's kinda sad. They are pretty nice in there and on occasion hook me up with a freebee. Over the last week or two something has been off and they have been messing up my order a few times, no big deal, a donut is a donut and I don't really give a shit as long as I have something to eat in the morning. This morning I hit my one stop breakfast joint and made the same order as usual, I pull around to the drive up and a new face greets me, a fairly plus size woman with flour all over her shirt and an attitude that gave me the impression she did not want to be working on this fine post Christmas morning. I gave her my $2.08 and a polite good morning she smirked back and gave me my order, as soon as I got it I opened the bag to take a quick look to see if they got my order right.
As soon as I opened the bag she gave me a quick ---- "What are you doing? I got the order right!" I didn't even have a chance to look in the bag to see if she did or not. I politely told her that I was just making sure because it had been messed up a couple times over the last couple weeks --- for once I was being nice, after all, it's the day after Christmas and even though I am hung over I still have a hint of holiday joy in my body and I want to share it with the world. She snaps back that she knows how to do her job and that I do not need to second guess her skills --- at this point I start to get a little irritated and I put my Jeep in park and take a look in the bag ---- ONCE AGAIN, WRONG FUCKING ORDER!!!! I once again look at her a ask her if she is confident in her abilities, and she gives me a smug "YES!!" In the back of my mind I hear the voices "OH FUCK!!! HERE WE GO!!! Something about the fat pompous bitch has just gotten under my skin and I can no longer stop myself from losing my temper. I hand her bag the bag with my breakfast in it and inform her that her "Dunkin Donut skills" are fucked and that her fat ass needs to go back and get her GED so she can go to Donut University. Inevitably words are exchanged and some idiotic argument between the difference between a "chocolate frosted" and a "chocolate glazed" donut ensues. At one point I almost started laughing because I could not believe that I was actually having an argument with this fat bitch over this, I figured a girl of her size could smell the difference from a mile away while at the same time fisting herself with a baked ham. If this dumb fat bitch would of just kept her fucking mouth shut none of this would of even took place and I would be on my way to the office.
I finally get this bitch to waddle over and get me the correct order, everyone behind the counter is laughing at what has just taken place and I cannot help but to laugh myself and shake my head. This has to be one of the dumbest fucking arguments I have ever been in and to make it even worse all of my holiday cheer has just flown out the fucking window. By the time she bounces her fat ass back with my breakfast she is half out of breath and almost wheezing, it took every bit of self-control I have not to laugh in her fat, bloated face. She hands me the bag and sarcastically asks "Do you need any napkins with that sir?" The tone in her voice was enough to make my blood boil, if my arms were 6 inches longer I would of busted that bitch in the face. I took the bag and told her that it was no wonder her fat trailer park ass worked at Dunkin Donuts and that she should take more time to learn her job and to stop eating all the fucking profits, with that said I drove off knowing that I could never go back there again, that fucking bitch just ruined my only sanctity for morning rush hour. Krispy Kream and therapy here I come.......
User Reviews
Submitted by William_Q_Percy (user info) at 2003-12-29 15:01:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
How the fuck do you mess up an order for ONE donut and ONE coffee? shit...
Submitted by Slopster53 (user info) at 2003-12-29 14:48:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Loved it.
Submitted by kgbpasha (user info) at 2003-12-27 04:06:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I've got 12,000 fucked stories about fat bitches that have ruined
my day. I wonder if a fat chick would still be a bitch if she was
skinny? Actually, I dont care now after re-reading that sentence.
Although, theres nothing wrong with rollin' a fattie.
Submitted by Nobb (user info) at 2003-12-27 03:40:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 just for this
"Submitted by beer-turtle (user info) at 2003-12-26 16:04:08 (#)
Ranking: 1
Well ya know why it's called PMS right?
Because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.
-turtle "
Now to read the story.
Submitted by Death_Metal_Dude (user info) at 2003-12-26 19:25:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Owned!
Submitted by Cassiopeia (user info) at 2003-12-26 17:39:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Krispy Kreme is better anyways... mmm.... original glazed donught.... mmmmmmmm
Submitted by beer-turtle (user info) at 2003-12-26 16:04:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Well ya know why it's called PMS right?
Because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.
-turtle
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2003-12-26 14:06:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
the big deal about mad cow is that it is a crippling brain disease that can kill in the matter of weeks.
nice. as a former fatty, its always fun to laugh at the currently fat people.
Submitted by KoolMang (user info) at 2003-12-26 13:58:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm glad I'm not a fat fucker.
"Intergalactic Superstatic!"
Submitted by YankeeHater (user info) at 2003-12-26 13:29:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
+1 for the line about fisting herself with a baked ham.
Just goes to show you that fisting and sodomy jokes just never, ever get old.
Submitted by KoolMang (user info) at 2003-12-26 12:35:48 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I don't see what the big deal is with Mad Cow Disease! It's pretty funny
to watch the cows stumble and fall over, in my opinion, hehe.
"Intergalactic Superstatic!"
Submitted by defender0417 at 2003-12-26 12:33:07 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
-2 because I was eating beef jerky when I read this.