An anonymous conclusion: and now I am alone, and I deserve it (2269 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.35 on 86 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (View user info) at 2004-08-05 21:29:44 EDT
"I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it baby." But he can't look me in the eyes. He kisses me, but he is seeing the man on the train. Goodbye. As good as done already.
I think to myself, "What have I done? If I lose you because of what that man did, I will kill that man. I will find him and make sure I hurt him more than he ever hurt me".
I call after him. He doesn't turn back, but in my head he says, "I really do love you Vivian". In my head he forgives me, because I will never forgive myself.
In reality, that slightly more painful and cruel sphere, karmic kickback will come for the wrongs I've committed. But it comes so fast.
And here comes the part, the part where I want to die, not two hours later. I detach from myself because that's the only way I will come out whole. In my mind, I am watching all this happen to another girl. This other girl is not me, I pretend. I become her, what I say becomes what she says, and so the bad thing that happened, happened to her, not me.
He says: You didn't even want to tell your parents. That makes you a slut, I'm sorry.
She says: How can you call me...that word?
He says: I speak how I feel. I don't think I'm going to be able to get past this. Do you know the number of ways you could have prevented this? I respect you zero.
She cries.
He says: People don't become victims, they make themselves victims.
She says: No, please. I need you to help me cope right now, I need you.
He says: I don't want to help you cope anymore.
She says: I TRIED TO STOP HIM.
He says: I never had a chance to prevent or stop this. You did. You were my world, and I can't even look at you the same way anymore.
He says: That man got exactly what he wanted. And you know what? You helped him.
And then he is gone.
Like that.
And I deserve this. I made an error, I know he is right. I should have struggled harder, fought back more, I should have somehow not let this happen to me. And then afterwards, I shouldn't have let myself get so carried away. I am at fault. In the confusion, I did the wrong thing. I am paying for it now.
I don't deserve him anymore.
Punish me, I said earlier. I said it to god, maybe. Punish me for what happened. For what I didn't do, and even for all the things I have done. Karma comes fast.
The only person I love this much, the only person who can make me feel right again after what happened, is gone. He is gone because he deserves someone better than me. Everything works out fair in the end.
Later in the shower, I can feel the water washing over me. Wash it away, god please take it away. I turn up the heat. I can feel it and it's scalding. I want it to stop. But I want to feel it too, I want to feel the pain because I deserve it. I sit there, crying and crying on the slippery white floor. Take it away, please.
I say to myself, don't you dare. I also say, just try me. I punch my thigh. I punch it as hard as I can, but I don't feel it. What a rueful testament to my weakness.
I think about what happened, and I throw up violently. And now I detach again, I feel myself slip away from reality, and it is not me throwing up, it is her.
She says, "I want to die". She says, "This hurts". I say, "Yes". She says, "Why are you pretending you're not me?" I say, "Fuck you, you're pathetic, and I don't want to be you." So I pretend just a little bit longer that this girl isn't me.
I am scared now. I'm scared about what happened, and how much wrong I did. I am scared to be alone.
I am alone. And I still love him so much.
There are things far too dark to comprehend. Sleep on it one more night. That was my motto. That's how I lived. One more night, I'm staying alive. A trite, stolen motto, but it worked.
Until now.
Sleep on it one more night? Fuck no.
I'm done.
User Reviews
Submitted by strangeparadox (user info) at 2004-09-08 18:41:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by thejayman (user info) at 2004-08-07 19:07:41 (#)
Ranking: -2
Congratulations, you've just highlighted why the internet annoys me so.
People like you, with not creative writing ability, telling tales of woe.
You honestly expect people to feel sorry for you. And unfortunatly, it
works. We see a constant stream of "*hugs*" "you seem sad". People are
buying into your ridicolous story, perhaps even believing it.
Wake up people. If "Vivian" were that emotionally disraught, would she
be publishing it freely on the internet? No.
---------
I would just like to point out that actually posting things is a very good way to deal with stuff. yeah maybe its a little weird but sometimes your problems get extremly overwhelming and you feel like no one that you know in real life understands you. by posting you may find a few people who do understand. they will offer condolances that may make you feel better. another good thing about it is that some/most of the people will say evil things about how you should kill yourself. this pisses you off. and to be pissed off is better than being depressed any day.
Submitted by Spiral_Abraxis (user info) at 2004-09-08 18:16:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/44384 <------------ check out this new girl she's really cute
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2004-09-08 18:02:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2004-08-19 13:48:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Stin (user info) at 2004-08-12 10:03:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Squirrel, I don't know you as well as most of the people on here, but I'd still like to offer my support and kind thoughts.
These guys are right; self-respect is something I wish I could put in a box and send to you. Someone (I forget who) said down there that it wasn't about how you dressed, how you stood, where you stood or any of those things, and they were right. You're an incredible, strong and talented girl who deserves the love of someone worthy of her.
Love him or not, you're worth more than that, you're worth the love and care and comfort of someone who will be appalled at what happened, not dismissive, cold and callous.
Hold your head high sweetheart, and be proud that you're beautiful person.
Submitted by hcp28 (user info) at 2004-08-10 13:09:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That's horrible. How can someone who loves you not forgive you? Take it I don't know the whole situation but still. I would hope I could forgive me girlfriend for her faults and mistakes, just like I would want her to forgive me. He is a quitter and you deserve better.
Submitted by Donitsu2002 (user info) at 2004-08-09 12:59:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Man, AJ i'm with ya there guy. Viv, tell me the general vicinity of where this guy is and AJ and I will go up there and "make him feel bad" for what he did.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-08-09 00:55:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Viv, you just say the word and I'll come to Chicago and take a baseball bat to his fucking knees.
You deserve better, not him.
Submitted by Judoka (user info) at 2004-08-08 22:18:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Pity Whore
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-08-08 20:37:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Naw Mr. Aaron, I love him.
Submitted by bargled (user info) at 2004-08-08 20:18:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hang him from the gallows pole.
Submitted by RideJohnnyRide (user info) at 2004-08-08 11:00:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Allow me to jump on the bandwagon of people who seem to be saying, "fuck regaining anyones respect." If he trashed you after something like that, plain and simple, he is a scumbag and does not deserve your love, trust, or friendship, let alone respect.
Submitted by Smithstudd (user info) at 2004-08-08 02:11:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Because only you know the whole truth its not my place to judge.But I will say that women who cry wolf are worse than the rapist himself.Now before anyone loses it on me let me explain first.Ive seen some some of my friends dragged into it in the last 3 years.One friend Had his ex girlfriend use it as an excuse for her wayward ways.You know the type its 5 in the morn shes drunk at some random guys house in his room.And her clothes fall off by accident.At 10 she wakes up finding her pride and dignity laying on the floor.As she creeps out of the room she thinking up a way out.
I had an ex once tell me that she was taken advantage of shortly afterward I found out it was by many different guys at many different times.
I could go on but it matters little to most,none to you im sure.The point im trying to make is that these bs stories take credibility from the true stories.If your story is true you and only you no that.Than I am truly sorry for you pain and if I knew the piece of shit Id snap his worthless neck.The world would be a better place for it.
Submitted by Nobb (user info) at 2004-08-07 23:32:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Your ex boyfriend needs his nuts chopped off, i'll do it if you want.
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-08-07 23:16:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It's easy to say that.
It's so much more complex though. I reacted badly to what happened, I lied to my parents.
And he hasn't left me yet, thank god.
Submitted by AlkalineSolo (user info) at 2004-08-07 23:02:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That guy who left you is a total dick and you deserve better. You didn't do ANYTHING wrong, something bad happened to you, and he left you when you needed him.
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-08-07 22:47:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks josie.
Submitted by AlwaysAnEagle (user info) at 2004-08-07 21:39:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So, I sort of mulled this over, and I hadn't really considered the title before.
Read my post called "1825 Days", and the much older one called "Justice". They are about the same incident, and this is where that started. You can do so much better, dahlin.
Shoot me an email or an IM if you'd like to chat, about this or anything else...email's my username at Hotmail and my IM is Josie3019.
Submitted by Sambuca310 (user info) at 2004-08-07 21:30:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
panda...
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-08-07 21:25:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
jay whatever:
Geoff knows me in real life, he knows who I am more than random internet people, and he is essentially right.
1. I wrote this right after all of that happened. I wrote this when I was very upset, I am able to type and form coherent sentences no matter what. Writing is cathartic for me. I've said that time and time again. Especially as I calm down, it helps me to get things out onto the computer screen, and submitting posts to uber feels like sending my problems off into space, it feels like I'm getting rid of the emotions.
2. I've been on uber for a decent amount of time, I've developed a reasonable social network here. Many of the people who offered their condolences to me here talk to me outside of uber, know more about me, and genuinely care (at least I think). Posting is a fast way to reach out to all of these people at once.
Submitted by Tenyuki (user info) at 2004-08-07 19:49:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by thejayman (user info) at 2004-08-07 19:07:41 (#)
Ranking: -2
Congratulations, you've just highlighted why the internet annoys me so.
People like you, with not creative writing ability, telling tales of woe.
You honestly expect people to feel sorry for you. And unfortunatly, it
works. We see a constant stream of "*hugs*" "you seem sad". People are
buying into your ridicolous story, perhaps even believing it.
Wake up people. If "Vivian" were that emotionally disraught, would she
be publishing it freely on the internet? No.
---------
How ironic that you're saying she lacks creative writing abilities when you write about Australian rap. Sad, isn't it? And I know my writing's crap, but at least I don't go around putting down peoples' writings.
People react to things differently than others. Maybe Vivian finds it better to write things out on the internet to help herself feel better.
And it's "ridiculous", you dumb fuck. Seems to me that it's you that lacks the "creative writing ability".
Submitted by thejayman (user info) at 2004-08-07 19:07:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Congratulations, you've just highlighted why the internet annoys me so.
People like you, with not creative writing ability, telling tales of woe.
You honestly expect people to feel sorry for you. And unfortunatly, it
works. We see a constant stream of "*hugs*" "you seem sad". People are
buying into your ridicolous story, perhaps even believing it.
Wake up people. If "Vivian" were that emotionally disraught, would she
be publishing it freely on the internet? No.
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-08-07 18:37:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You guys are truly priceless.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2004-08-07 17:21:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I am intrigued. I don't mean that the way it sounds.
Submitted by Scott_James (user info) at 2004-08-07 15:34:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
*hugs*
Drop me a line next time your on AIM, Viv.
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2004-08-07 04:01:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm sorry you're not happy right now. *hug*
Submitted by kai070169 (user info) at 2004-08-06 21:13:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think I love you, but what am I so afraid of?
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2004-08-06 16:44:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It is not healthy to be emotionally dependent on anyone.
That is not to say you can't love someone, but you MUST be able to sustain on your own.
In the long run, losing him may be the best thing for you.
Submitted by Tenyuki (user info) at 2004-08-06 16:43:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Davy Jones, you're my new best friend.
Submitted by tomato-soup at 2004-08-06 16:34:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
after all is said and done, youre still a slut
Submitted by DavyJones (user info) at 2004-08-06 16:23:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
OLAS - You are cool, and this was well written. Sorry this happened to you. On the other hand, you are being fucking stupid about it. "Look at me, I have no self respect, I need to go earn some worthless shitbags respect back so he will love me, ho hum." C'mon, how much more of a stereotype do you want to be? How much farther down do you have to go before it's "he hit me but it's my fault, he really does love me and he's a great guy." Shut. The. Fuck. Up. Quit being pathetic. Sometimes I don't even know who is worse, the abusive member of the relationship, or the dumbfuck who covers for them by saying the blame is their own, "but he really is a great guy. ... I'm definitely not being fair to him." I can't even empathize for someone who thinks this. The only feeling I can associate with this level of worthlessness is pity. I pity you for allowing yourself to be this valueless. Do you have any feeling of self worth? You aren't showing it.
Everyone here knows that not only you, but anybody deserves better than this.
Submitted by Random Coward at 2004-08-06 16:07:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
"Kind of cowardly, don't you think?"
If you want me to leave you alone, maybe you should stop calling me out.
I wouldn't "hide" if we were alone but there's too much herd thinking here to be perfectly honest.
Have a good week-end.
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-08-06 15:54:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Also, maybe you should log in to face the flaming, why not, if this is what you really want to say. If you really believe what you are saying, and aren't ashamed of it, there's no reason to hide behind an extra cloak of anonymity.
Maybe you just don't want to face the fact that the person you're saying this to is a pathetic seventeen year old girl. That might be kind of debilitating, to know you can't even face a seventeen year old girl ONLINE. Kind of cowardly, don't you think?
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-08-06 15:45:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Please go pick on someone your own size. If you have so much life experience, go share it with someone else.
I did not victimize myself, I am not lying, everything in this story happened and the dialogue is copy-pasted. I am not doing this for your attention, so please leave me alone right now.
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-08-06 15:31:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Why would I log in ? This way I can speak my mind freely without the risk of being flammed from mindless idiots who can't see through your childish game. Victimizing works when you're 6.
I was once fooled by someone exactly like you.
The dude was smarter than me to leave you rot.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2004-08-06 15:22:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-08-06 15:16:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Fuck you. Least you could do is log in if you're going to do that.
Also, please don't spit fucking bullshit mainstream music at me to try to "teach me a lesson" or tell me my feelings.
You don't know the whole story, you don't know who I am and why I love this person so much, you have no idea how much it hurts to feel him slipping through my fingers. You have no idea what it's like to not be able to do anything about losing him, and know that all the things I've done wrong and how badly I handled the situation mean that I may have fucked up for the last time.
This isn't a plea for sympathy, I wrote this as I felt it. I felt everything I wrote in there quite acutely, I don't want your pity, it just felt good to get this out there.
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-08-06 15:07:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I was listening to A Perfect Circle while I read that
Excerpt from lyrics of The Outsider
...
Medicated, drama queen, picture perfect, numb belligerance
Narcisistic, drama queen, craving fame and all this decadence
Lying through your teeth again <---------
Suicidal imbecile
Think about it, put it on the fautline
What'll it take to get it through to you precious
I'm over this, why do you wanna throw it away like this
Such a mess, why would i wanna watch you
...
How appropriate for this obvious lame attempt at getting sympathy. I especially hate that part:
"And I deserve this. I made an error, I know he is right. I should have struggled harder, fought back more, I should have somehow not let this happen to me."
Submitted by sublime (user info) at 2004-08-06 14:37:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-08-06 14:08:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Thank you so much guys, but he really is a great guy. I love him and have become somewhat emotionally dependent on him (an understatement if there ever was one), so I suppose I'm definitely not being fair to him
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2004-08-06 12:31:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
wow i was close, lojope's response was 228 words.
Submitted by kukd85 (user info) at 2004-08-06 12:31:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Lojope is sooo right. You have no reason to feel the need to "work" for anyones respect. Especially someone who was so close to you and won't support you and be there for you after you have been hurt and violated in one of the worst ways possible. Please, please, please see someone and get some help. You need to understand that you did ABSOLUTELY NOTHING wrong. As much as it hurts to hear it, (trust me, I know) He is not worth it. I know you will see it in time. Someone who doesn't support you and your feelings is not someone you should want to be with. Bottom line. You deserve someone who will be there for you and comfort you. Good luck!
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2004-08-06 12:30:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I got 3 words and 3 words alone:
Fuck his respect.]
oh yea...
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-08-06 09:31:02 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-08-06 09:00:40 (#)
Ranking: 0
Thank you everyone.
I'm going to be okay, I just need to work as hard as he'll let me to regain his respect.
~*~*~*~*~*~
Bullshit. Viv, you need a crash course in self-respect. I don't know what happened exactly (though I think I have a pretty good idea), but I trust Monty's judgement, and I have an idea of the kind of person you are from reading your posts. YOU DON'T NEED TO EARN HIS RESPECT. You deserve it. You did NOTHING wrong. And he is an asshole if he makes you think anything different. You shouldn't be trying to earn back his respect, you should be kicking him to the curb, knowing that he's not good enough for you. ANYONE who would make you feel like you have something to be sorry for is NOT GOOD ENOUGH for you. Anyone who would walk away when you needed them to comfort you is NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU. ANYONE who would make you feel ashamed and guilty because some asshole on a train did something innapropriate to you without your consent is NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU.
I wish I could make you see, but I know from experience that girls like you need to find out for yourself, and won't hear the truth even if a hundred voices shout it to you.
But you need to hear it anyway, so I will keep shouting.
It was NOT your fault.
You are NOT to blame.
The guilt and shame is HIS alone.
and that...
um....i dont know how many words that is...
im going to go with 246.
Submitted by Smurfs (user info) at 2004-08-06 12:18:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I hate these situations
'She says: I TRIED TO STOP HIM.'
Right there he should have stopped being belligerent and comforted you. Honestly I don't know your history, but you might be better off. He sounds somewhat petty and insecure.
And I'm being nice
*hugs*
Submitted by Rael11x (user info) at 2004-08-06 12:08:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
<exiting 6-month lurking mode>
OLAS,
Lojope is right. You shouldn't have to work to regain his respect. If he doesn't love and respect you as it is, then even though this isn't the way you would have wanted to part, it may be for the best. You didn't do anything wrong, so he shouldn't put blame on you.
Little Squirrel-Mistress, if you look at the support you are getting from around here, you will see you are loved and respected. Maybe the voices from Uber aren't active in your daily life as you go to school, socialize, or whatever, but you've shared a piece of yourself that people have found beauty in. Like anybody else that you meet at school, work, etc., we don't know what you are like behind your own closed doors. So we go by what you have chosen to show us. I'm one of the ones who looks forward to your posts.
You've shown a beautiful and strong spirit, but we all are fragile in our own way. You've taken a fucking hell of a blow, and seeing how it has never happened to me, I can't even pretend to understand. I do understand the feeling of being wrongly denied support, though.
If you got away, you did something right. If he can't see that, that's not your fault. You've got some shit to deal with now, so if he can't help you, go to someone who can. Whateve your support is in your life, look to them. Seek professional help. I'm sure Lojope can hook you up with them right people.
Blessed Be
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-08-06 09:31:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-08-06 09:00:40 (#)
Ranking: 0
Thank you everyone.
I'm going to be okay, I just need to work as hard as he'll let me to regain his respect.
~*~*~*~*~*~
Bullshit. Viv, you need a crash course in self-respect. I don't know what happened exactly (though I think I have a pretty good idea), but I trust Monty's judgement, and I have an idea of the kind of person you are from reading your posts. YOU DON'T NEED TO EARN HIS RESPECT. You deserve it. You did NOTHING wrong. And he is an asshole if he makes you think anything different. You shouldn't be trying to earn back his respect, you should be kicking him to the curb, knowing that he's not good enough for you. ANYONE who would make you feel like you have something to be sorry for is NOT GOOD ENOUGH for you. Anyone who would walk away when you needed them to comfort you is NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU. ANYONE who would make you feel ashamed and guilty because some asshole on a train did something innapropriate to you without your consent is NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU.
I wish I could make you see, but I know from experience that girls like you need to find out for yourself, and won't hear the truth even if a hundred voices shout it to you.
But you need to hear it anyway, so I will keep shouting.
It was NOT your fault.
You are NOT to blame.
The guilt and shame is HIS alone.
Submitted by plushpeach (user info) at 2004-08-06 09:14:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
When I first read the title I thought perhaps you were making fun of a post I did yesterday.(I know I'm rather conceited to think a noob like me would garner that much attention!) And I was all ready to -2 this tory. After reading it I'd rather it was a rage post against me or something saying how much I suck or blah blah blah.
Shit girl! So sorry, but keep this in mind, "No man is worth your tears, and the one who is won't make you cry." I hope this offers a little comfort.
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-08-06 09:00:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Thank you everyone.
I'm going to be okay, I just need to work as hard as he'll let me to regain his respect.
Submitted by AshK (user info) at 2004-08-06 08:29:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Things like this make me so angry. Angry at the man who hurt you and angry at your boyfriend for using it as another way to hurt you. Of course, all I know of your boyfriend is what you post here but the man seems to be trying to keep you under control with every emotional trick in the book. I can only hope (and pray) that you will come to understand what many other women on this site understand, this is NOT your fault. It wasn't how you dressed, or how you stood, or where you stood, or the color of your eyebrows. It was the fault of a CRIMINAL on a train.
Submitted by orange-cat (user info) at 2004-08-06 06:40:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
wow
Submitted by Ainkara (user info) at 2004-08-06 06:08:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I love you! I'm not sure if that helps, but I do. *hugs*
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-08-06 02:35:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
A Masterpiece.... end of story
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2004-08-06 02:28:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Do you assholes have any idea how precious a mind she has? Do you have any idea what kind of dedication it takes to study ballet? To love it after all the screaming and hitting and 'fat lady' abuse. What kind of courage it takes to be your own person when everything around you is beating this idea of 'oneness' into you...
This girl is one in a billion. I don't want to meet another billion people, OLAS: diamond in the rough--don't sweat anything beautiful--the world is going to come around and see things your way.
I promise.
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2004-08-06 00:34:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
squirrel is the kicker of all ass, i talked to her on aim godchicken.
She's one of our native prodigies.
Submitted by AlwaysAnEagle (user info) at 2004-08-06 00:27:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I almost wish this wasn't so well written.
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2004-08-06 00:26:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
If he said some of the things up there to you for real, then YOU deserve better. Trying to make it seem your fault for what happened is fucking bullshit of the highest order.
We Love the Squirrel Girl. Talk to me when you can.
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-08-05 23:58:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh BARF!
Submitted by Gnome (user info) at 2004-08-05 23:58:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hate reading shit like this. but uber seems to be therapy. hope you find all the support you need.
Submitted by spedmonkey (user info) at 2004-08-05 23:12:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Viv... you need anything, you talk to me, y'hear?
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-08-05 22:55:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Very good. Honest. (And coming from the same Random Joe who criticized your undercover geek post, that's saying a lot). As hard as it may be, try your best to stay away from your boyfriend (ex-boyfriend?) for a while. Trust me, it's the best way for you to detach yourself from the situation emotionally, so you can begin to look at it objectively. Good luck.
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2004-08-05 22:47:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
squirrel: Drop me an im if you are still online? insanethemind on aim, same on msn
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-08-05 22:20:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You'd suck even more cock if you could have HALF of my life, Urkel.
Submitted by dakingisdead (user info) at 2004-08-05 22:19:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Shlongy
Your welcome. Anytime.
Now go get a life.
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2004-08-05 22:13:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i dont know what to say, besides please dont do self harm and be sure to seek help if you feel at ALL that you might need it.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-08-05 22:13:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Gee...I can't wait until I am able to "right" non-shitty posts.
Thanks for the update, shitforbrains.
Submitted by dakingisdead (user info) at 2004-08-05 22:09:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Squirrel You have just gotta stop being so NICE.
Also if he ain't standing by you now he wasn't worth it.
Mace is good.
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-08-05 22:08:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Godchicken: If/when you read this, I did end up telling him everything. And this happened not because I told the truth, he reacted well to that, and I thank you for that advice. I'm going to sleep now though, so I'll talk to you when I can.
Submitted by korthrun (user info) at 2004-08-05 22:07:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Don't beat yourself up to hard. From what little I can gather of the situation it sounds like this "he" needs to be a bit more understanding. Sometimes there are shitty situations, and you just need to do what it takes to get out sane and alive. If it means letting some dude lick your ass then so be it. If it means shooting the father of your child, then it must be done. That is that.
Hopefully not completly off on wtf is going on,
Korth
Submitted by dakingisdead (user info) at 2004-08-05 22:04:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nah Schlongy you just right shitty posts.
However If you really wanted the anal raping, and thought it would help your posting abilitites, then head on down to your local gay bar wearing nothing but leather chaps.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-08-05 22:02:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Courage, love. Courage. I am so sorry.
It was NOT your fault.
You are NOT to blame.
The guilt and shame IS HIS alone.
I know of many online resources, email me if you are interested.
All my love, Viv. You will survive this.
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-08-05 22:02:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Insanethemind, yesterday and today.
Shlongy, please fuck off. I didn't get raped, if you read my reviews it would say that, and I don't appreciate you making light of this.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-08-05 21:58:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Did Bart put the Uber site banner on the Google "Rape" search engine?
I mean, this is getting a bit ridiculous, dontcha think?
No wonder I can't get a +2 around here...I haven't been anally raped and live to write about it...yet.
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2004-08-05 21:56:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
this happened recently, if i may ask??
Submitted by KoolMang (user info) at 2004-08-05 21:53:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-08-05 21:50:51 (#)
Ranking: 0
So, am I to understand...has EVERY broad in Uber been raped?
And has every guy in this room written about his latest or best dump?
Good grief, Charley Brown.
*************
Yeah, good point.
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-08-05 21:52:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I didn't get raped, it didn't go that far and I got away.
Submitted by dakingisdead (user info) at 2004-08-05 21:51:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn Squirrel what the fuck happened to you?
I'm just gonna get my gun!
Damn I don't have a gun......ok If I was there I would break his fucking knee caps and he would be sleeping with the fishes.
NOBODY should be allowed to hurt someone as nice as you!
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-08-05 21:50:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So, am I to understand...has EVERY broad in Uber been raped?
And has every guy in this room written about his latest or best dump?
Good grief, Charley Brown.
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2004-08-05 21:48:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Best of luck, Viv.
I know it'll all work out for you eventually. I just hope 'eventually' doesn't come too hard. :)
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-08-05 21:48:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No lojo, it isn't.
Submitted by Yams (user info) at 2004-08-05 21:41:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I know a friend who almost got in this situation, but that was all my fault. I could've done something, but instead I just let some pervetted ass bag make his moves. That's because I'm a fuck!
Submitted by Tenyuki (user info) at 2004-08-05 21:38:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
+2 for the writing.
-2 for what's being written.
...if that made sense.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-08-05 21:37:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Holy shit...
Tell me this is fiction, please tell me it's fiction.
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-08-05 21:36:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks to jared and monty, I would be even worse off without you guys.
You're amazing.
Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish (user info) at 2004-08-05 21:31:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm not even going to subtract the usual point for emotion.
Submitted by KoolMang (user info) at 2004-08-05 21:31:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
What?
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-08-05 21:31:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
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