Ubersite
Home - About Us - Contact
"Work is the scourge of the drinking classes." - Oscar Wilde
Welcome to Ubersite!
Search Ubersite
Search for:

Most Recently Reviewed
  1. Super Important Question
  2. A Stoned Question
  3. Stop! Weathertime, Boring...
  4. In response to: 5 question...
  5. This isn't creepy at all...
  6. Part III (For jumpinjellyf...
  7. What's your Theme Song, Ub...
  8. Animal Match-Ups In .gif F...
  9. Sleep now?
  10. I'm Back!
more...
Most Heated
  1. Sleep now? (83 heat)
  2. What's your Theme Song, Ub... (48 heat)
  3. This isn't creepy at all... (30 heat)
  4. Super Yum? (30 heat)
  5. 2012: It Could Happen... (24 heat)
  6. SPT, I know why Shlongy di... (22 heat)
  7. Stop! Weathertime, Boring... (21 heat)
  8. Wuthering Heights – A book... (21 heat)
  9. Le Post de Jeudi - Avec Merde (18 heat)
  10. Super Important Question (17 heat)
more...
Most Viewed Messages
  1. The Ultimate MS Paint: It... (1216833 hits)
  2. "If I cum now, will it be ... (774143 hits)
  3. How The Hell Do I Get Out ... (507673 hits)
  4. Exploiting Peer-to-Peer Ne... (427349 hits)
  5. Motivating the Weekend (383716 hits)
  6. How To Pick Up Chicks (352532 hits)
  7. Knockoff porn movie titles (327843 hits)
  8. My J-Date Misadventure (317729 hits)
  9. Masturbating on Skype with... (313716 hits)
  10. Badass Australian Cows (275464 hits)
more...
Most Viewed Authors
  1. Bart Cilfone (1572746 hits)
  2. S. William Moore II (1562185 hits)
  3. Razor (1536156 hits)
  4. JMG114 (1496972 hits)
  5. Sydeburnz (1433051 hits)
  6. MickGinny (1400425 hits)
  7. loki (1143751 hits)
  8. Jonukah (1084191 hits)
  9. VACANCY (1071552 hits)
  10. Sayonara (1065609 hits)
  11. weeeeep (1026954 hits)
  12. Obama Fofana (993893 hits)
  13. Yankees! (979697 hits)
  14. Tom (923202 hits)
  15. THE MIGHTY APOLLO (847621 hits)
  16. I Got A Life So I Don't Ha... (833598 hits)
  17. ++TIGER++ ++LILLY++ (815369 hits)
  18. Sorrell (805583 hits)
  19. Wally (797892 hits)
  20. RIP™ (778871 hits)
  21. Tremble, hetero swine! (760373 hits)
  22. Phallic_Cymbals (751918 hits)
  23. RON PAUL 2008! (749269 hits)
  24. HIDDEN101 (741484 hits)
  25. Will Zone (728033 hits)
  26. T then ToM (719901 hits)
  27. User Blocked (714453 hits)
  28. iddqd (701020 hits)
  29. kaos-king (687759 hits)
  30. kaos-king (670209 hits)
Click here to return to the list of messages.

The DMV (706 hits)

Category: None

Rating: 0.27 on 16 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Labels:

Submitted by Jenbee<imissemoboy.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2004-10-20 18:48:47 EDT


Do you remember?

That fateful day all those years ago?

Sweaty palms, dry mouth, the anticipation killing you...

Your mother is driving you to the DMV for your drive test. Your teenage life as you know it will come crashing down is you do not get your lisence; you have already made plans and booked up the use of your mom's car for the next six months.

You get there and report to window two. You wait. You are instructed to have a lisenced driver help you to the test lane. You nervously inch towards the test lane... Life is slowing down...He exits... clipboard in hand. The look on his face is grave and says something along the lines of getting this done before his next cigarette break. He sighs heavily as he sits in the passenger seat. He oozes with hatred for your kind. The young. The acne-ridden. The teenaged.

You politely remind him to buckle his seat belt; you know their tricks. After a check of your lights and a readjustment of your mirrors just for show, you're off. Blinker...right... Good. You made it. Just eight more minutes and your popularity level skyrockets.

Coming up to an intersection, you brake slowly and smoothly. No jerky rides for the man administering YOUR test. You are cool, calm, and so in control.

"Now, turn left."

You signal, look, and take off. Then, the unthinkable! Horns! Yelling! Screeching brakes!

"That's it. Turn around and go back to the DMV. This test is finished."

You are SO not getting laid next weekend, and now you're going to have to ask your mom for a ride to your friend's LAN party. Oh well, you're going to rule at Splinter Cell.

Submit to Digg Submit to StumbleUpon

User Reviews


Submitted by RkaDk2 (user info) at 2004-12-18 10:54:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 1

It took my spastic self 3 tries, and I only passed the third time because it was really cold outside.
The apethetic bastard ACTUALLY said to me, "You only scored 78, but damn it's cold! Let me take another look at this...... oops, I miscounted, now it's an 80. For the love of god, get some practice."



Submitted by Freight_Train (user info) at 2004-12-18 10:30:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 1

weak ending

Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2004-12-18 10:05:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 1

...the fuck is a LAN party?

Submitted by rcchristi (user info) at 2004-11-09 21:12:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Yours is the shortest experience with the Department of Motor Vehicles.
Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Submitted by scrumdown (user info) at 2004-10-27 13:48:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

potential


Submitted by SwissCamel (user info) at 2004-10-20 21:31:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

8 minutes? you Americans have it easy with the driving test then?

'I did not read this, but I don't like the DMV and thus I don't like sitting in my house on my free time and reading about the DMV'- Jester

Submitted by Sepsis (user info) at 2004-10-20 19:56:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

this was good. it needs a positive rating.

Submitted by FreshPrince (user info) at 2004-10-20 19:47:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

+1 for effort

Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2004-10-20 19:38:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

You signal, look, and take off. Then, the unthinkable! Horns! Yelling! Screeching brakes!


+2 for that line.

Submitted by TheMidnight12AM (user info) at 2004-10-20 19:28:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1

Too short.

Submitted by JenBee (user info) at 2004-10-20 19:24:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

I actually had intentions of going further, but then I got off work and wrapped it up a little too soon. Or really too soon.

Submitted by Sepsis (user info) at 2004-10-20 19:12:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

needs more.

Submitted by johnson (user info) at 2004-10-20 18:54:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

I did not read this, but I don't like the DMV and thus I don't like sitting in my house on my free time and reading about the DMV.

Submitted by DonkeyOnTheEdge (user info) at 2004-10-20 18:52:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

You could have gone sooooo much further with this. But it made me smile.

Submitted by tinactin (user info) at 2004-10-20 18:51:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

I think you need to develop this into something. I liked the imagery and memory association with the DMV, but it didn't really go anywhere.

Submitted by sg11588 (user info) at 2004-10-20 18:50:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

-2 die


Marge: It was a beautiful wedding. I've never seen Selma happier.

Homer: That reminds me -- Troy said something interesting last night
at the bar. Apparently he doesn't really love Selma and the
marriage is just a sham to help his career.

A Fish Called Selma