Sunshine Shielas and the Devil Child (488 hits)
Category: HumorRating: 1.33 on 9 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Fabit (View user info) at 2005-07-19 10:58:42 EDT
I went to a kick arse festival this weekend called the Larmer Tree festival. I don't know if any other Uberers were there - if you were I hope you had as much fun as I did - it was scorching hot for all four days, I met some really cool people and some wankers as well. Good times my friends good times.
What was awesome though is the bands. It was unlike any other festival I've known. I'd be sat in the acoustic café (a big top tent with a big stage and an even bigger bar) and the bands would come off stage, through their dressing room, grab a new beer and then sit out with the crowd watching the next band! AWESOME! One came and sat next to me and my mate on a table at the back and started chatting away. He was real mellow and gave us one of his CD's for free because "he was bored of listening to it so we might as well have it"!
Everyone was super friendly and cause it was so hot all the ladys were wondering round in bikini tops sweating their tits off! AMAZINGLY AWESOME. It was eye candy a plenty and I wasn't going to whinge.
This little boy tried to ruin my shit because he was a little dick head, he would randomly come up and slap me on the head. We tried the normal retorts
"Dude fuck off before I eat your face"
And
"Shut the fuck up before I tell everyone that if the dog hadn't beaten me over the fence I'd be your daddy right now"
But unfortunately all of these things went straight over his head. What with him being 9 and all.
So later on the Saturday night when he turned up to ruin my shit again we moved away and sat down next to a wire fence in the shade for a bit and he followed (mwahahaha the plan was working beautifully) he sat down next to us being an annoying little shit again. My mate was waiting on the other side of the fence with a big long glow stick.
As soon as the little shite started trying to annoy me with his cap gun (god they get old quick) I snatched it off him and poked it through the fence. He stuck his podgy little arms through (that's right another fat kid born in the 90's ruins my day) my mategrabbed his arms and tied them to the fence with the glowstick. He started whinging to let be let go so we told him to apologise and to promise not to be a little dick. He refused so we walked away and left him there.
We had a pang of guilt and checked back 5 minutes later and the little shit had escaped. We only saw him once more that weekend and he was tugging his dads arm and pointing at us. His dad didn't even move.
Must be a gobshite at home too!
User Reviews
Submitted by sKipB (user info) at 2005-11-29 09:38:51 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
fag times 3
Submitted by Fabit (user info) at 2005-07-20 04:39:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2005-07-19 12:05:21 (#)
Ranking: 2
Funny stuff Fabit, tough day to get attention though eh?
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Tell me about it! Maybe more luck now eh? I may wait until UM has finished before psoting again!
Submitted by Darth_Adwain (user info) at 2005-07-19 13:17:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
nice
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2005-07-19 12:05:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Funny stuff Fabit, tough day to get attention though eh?
Submitted by Fabit (user info) at 2005-07-19 11:53:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-07-19 11:48:35 (#)
Ranking: 2
You are an evil and devious man.
This pleases me.
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Nudge nudge, wink wink. I'll show ya evil darlin'!
Arf Arf
Submitted by Fabit (user info) at 2005-07-19 11:51:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Maybe, it's impressive that i'm allowed to be a youth worker at all. Maybe putting things inside children that weren't previously there may be a push too far?
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-07-19 11:48:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You are an evil and devious man.
This pleases me.
Submitted by w_t_a_y_s_t_r_m (user info) at 2005-07-19 11:23:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You know what you should have done with the glow stick, and he would never have gone near you again.
Plus the shame would stop him even trying to tell his dad.
Plus, it's a festival!
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2005-07-19 11:01:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
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