Get to know me... (859 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.95 on 27 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Vulva (View user info) at 2006-08-01 00:59:43 EDT
I've been gone for a while. Most would say this does NOT hurt their feelings. For the rest of you who have forgotten or have never had the pleasure, allow me to introduce me. I am the guy who allegedly... ah fuck it, nevermind (see prior posts to uncover accusations). You'll learn more about me by reading the list of things I hate. This was sparked by the fact that I recently moved to a place where I pretty much hate everyone. C'mon people, let it flow like water... allow me to start.
I hate:
The smell of cabbage
Fear
Parachutes
Paralegals
Paramedic uniforms
Paralysis
Paradigms
Morning people
Runners
Cyclists
Sharks
The smell of farts that are not mine
Banannas
Daewoo cars
McDonalds breakfast
New car scented items
Junk mail
Junk bonds
Junk food
Junk in the trunk
Junk yards
Asians who don't know karate
Jock straps
Really hot shower water
The sound of my alarm clock
Tampons
Lifetime channel
Venus Williams
Serena Williams
Venus and Serena Williams parents
Diet Pepsi
Diet Coke
Noisy keyboards
Attention whores
Macintosh
Glamour shots
Stickies that aren't yellow
People who mean "than" and use "then"
Wiggers
V-neck t-shirts
The Dallas Cowboys
Applesauce
Guys who bring their own pool cue to a bar
Dull scissors
Dull people
Dot matrix printouts
Babies
Flickering flourescent lightbulbs
MSNBC newscasters
Bread boxes
Noisy mufflers
Dial-up connections
Walking long distances in flip flops
Painful shits
Women who STILL think they're sexy cause they wear thongs
Women who wear too much makeup
Women who kiss other women for attention from onlooking men
Women who say "I'm different"
Women who collect alimony
Women in general (minus sex)
Monster trucks
Small waves
Long replies to posts on uber
The black lines visible on a monitor that's being recorded by a TV camera
Thin toilet paper
Felt tip pens
Fat cheerleaders
Dirty white shoes
That spot of lint and hair on the back-center part of a toilet seat from your sweaty ass
Too much bass
Too little treble
Picture frames with words on them
Slow greens
Slow fairways
Slow waitresses
Slow drivers
Slow cooks
Slow-vokia
Slow Jams
Slow computers
Having to shit in a public restroom
Ice cube trays
The confusing rules of cricket
Well-done steak
People who have their kids pictures on their mousepad
Anyone reading this far down on my list
Kim Jong Il
Bad teeth
Scented soap at the carwash
The 3 foot rule at a strip club
Avtars
Retards
Cigar bars
Cookie jars
Hot woman with a smelly snatch
Chairs with wheels
Pink cowboy hats
Clocks that make noise
Cats
Cat people
David copperfield
Badminton
Randy Moss
Speed stick deodorant (original scent/green)
Techno music
Tighty Whitey's
Taxes
Pens that are colors other than blue, black, or blue/black
The people who use aforementioned pens
Working at home after work
Waiting two and a half years for "The Transporter 2" to be made
Losing
Men's tennis matches
The uberboard
Sex after a big meal
The price of gasoline
People who go shopping at 3am the morning after thanksgiving
Vaginal discharge
Laundry
Bull dykes
People who hate NASCAR
Personalized coffee mugs
Smart asses
People who drink wine to seem sophisticated
Women who use hyphenated last names
Women with an opinion
Women who can't cook
Women who won't cook in order to feel liberated
Women who can't take a joke
Women who can't take a punch
Women who can't do a shot
Women who should be shot
Receipts
Grocery store lines
Cheap cigarettes
People who smoke cheap cigarettes
Europeans who still refer to cigarettes as "fags"
Star Wars
Star Trek
Star search
Star Magazine
Star Jones
Alters
Liars
Carrot juice
Getting older
Stereos that won't play burnt cd's
Guys who wear their high school class rings
The fact I can only open one drawer at a time on my file cabinet
America's image
Venison
Farrakahn
Day planners
Roosters
Barbed wire
Egg Beaters
and ther is one more that I can't think of... I'll have to get back to you on it.
Fuck off for now!
User Reviews
Submitted by strwbryfanatic (user info) at 2007-04-06 02:50:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Urbane Mischief worked up the courage to post this series of pictures of her at work under her infamous alter's name. Clue: the first 3 letters of her alter's name is "vag."
Submitted by Vulva (user info) at 2006-08-04 01:09:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by vagabond (user info) at 2006-08-04 00:58:24 (#)
Ranking: -2
why should i care?
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Because hate is the cure for your disease, faggotnessness. Go somewhere and die!
Submitted by vagabond (user info) at 2006-08-04 00:58:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
why should i care?
Submitted by ih8u2man (user info) at 2006-08-02 11:10:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I hate it all too.
Submitted by ih8u2man (user info) at 2006-08-02 10:58:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The Vulvinator IS BAAAAAACK!
Look out fools.
Submitted by Vulva (user info) at 2006-08-01 21:45:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2006-08-01 12:11:45 (#)
Ranking: -2
I hate:
The Squeelers
==========================
The Steelers are still the current ambassador of our sport. Deal with it!
Submitted by Vulva (user info) at 2006-08-01 21:44:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-08-01 13:23:58 (#)
Ranking: 1
That's a pretty good list, assface.
============================================
Sup freak! Hows the golf game been?
Submitted by Vulva (user info) at 2006-08-01 21:43:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by krissi (user info) at 2006-08-01 12:17:12 (#)
Ranking: 1
Hahaha. You think the Urbane situation made you famous.
=========================================================
No, it made me transparent. BUT, how else do you remember me? Nuff said.
Submitted by Vulva (user info) at 2006-08-01 21:42:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2006-08-01 09:35:25 (#)
Ranking: 0
moron
==========================
Whaaa! I am surprised at this one.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-08-01 17:03:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you also hate vienna sausages covering up the steeze, don't forget that.
Submitted by BadAssJulie (user info) at 2006-08-01 13:43:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Asians who don't know karate? What if they don't know karate but they practice a different type of martial art?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-08-01 13:23:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
That's a pretty good list, assface.
I hate most of that shit, too. Did you include "onions" and "fat broads"?
Submitted by krissi (user info) at 2006-08-01 12:17:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
"I am the guy who allegedly... ah fuck it, nevermind (see prior posts to uncover accusations)."
Hahaha. You think the Urbane situation made you famous.
Meh. Who am I to talk?
I don't love you, and I never will. Sorry.
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2006-08-01 12:11:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I hate:
The Squeelers
Submitted by Vulva (user info) at 2006-08-01 11:00:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by EmoJean (user info) at 2006-08-01 07:31:08 (#)
Ranking: -2
Whining fucks who dissapear for months and expect that when they come back I should give a flying fuck what they think or care about.
Didn't you like Date Urbane....isn't that enough to say that your rationale is a bit fucked anyway?
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Um No.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-08-01 09:58:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
so what exactly do you have against ms courtney cox-arquette?
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2006-08-01 09:35:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
moron
Submitted by EmoJean (user info) at 2006-08-01 07:31:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Whining fucks who dissapear for months and expect that when they come back I should give a flying fuck what they think or care about.
Didn't you like Date Urbane....isn't that enough to say that your rationale is a bit fucked anyway?
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-08-01 04:14:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You hate venison? What the fuck is wrong with you?
Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2006-08-01 03:59:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That's some good hatin'.
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2006-08-01 02:36:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I also despise the "then/than" thing.
Stupid hillbillies.
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2006-08-01 02:01:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2006-08-01 01:29:31 (#)
Ranking: 2
i love painful shits..
***
you are not alone
Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2006-08-01 01:29:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i love painful shits..
does that make me gay?
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2006-08-01 01:20:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Woo
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2006-08-01 01:19:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Morning people
good call
Submitted by Antioxident (user info) at 2006-08-01 01:08:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Darth_Famine (user info) at 2006-08-01 01:06:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
David copperfield
the book, the person or both? wouldnt the list of things you dont hate have been shorter? might save you from carpel tunnel later :)